Friday, May 23, 2008

unmet longings

the Lord is my Shepherd; i shall not want. psalm 23:1

reading the above scripture i think but i do want Lord. unmet longings. i longed for a husband for a long time. i thought i needed a husband. what i needed was God. then i thought God was enough. He filled my heart with such love and joy. in february God stirred my longings and desires. He awakened in me something that i thought was at rest. He brought someone into my life and i started wondering what life would be like with him. i was content in my singleness and i thank God for that but now i'm wanting more. the book i'm reading right now, walking with God, says it's not good to bury the deep longings of our hearts. having been awakened to my unmet longing i have wanted it more and more. God awakened this desire in my heart and i can't help but wonder what He's going to do about it. cs lewis says in 'the weight of glory' that what God uses to awaken desire is not necessarily what we long for. if it is not that relationship that i desire but what it points to then what is it. i have wondered for months why God brought us together. now i wonder how He is going to meet that longing that He has awakened in me.

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