Tuesday, July 12, 2005
chico's generosity
my back and neck have been bothering me since i returned to costa rica. i have not been sleeping well because of it and one day a bed was delivered to our house. for me. from chico. this young man works 6 days a week, sometimes leaving the house and 4 a.m. to walk to whichever farm he might be working at for the day, returning 13 or 14 hours later. not all days are the same, sometimes he can only get a few hours work a day. he earns dirt poor wages, slaving under a blistering hot sun at 38 or 39 degrees, or in torrential rains. he buys clothes and other things for the other boys. he gave the most money to the church to buy the new keyboard. he helps support the family. dany and jonny graduate this year and chico has said that once dany and jonny are finished school he will go to school next year so he can get an education. chico had thought that a special bed would help my back and thought nothing of spending money to help me feel better. i explained that the bed wouldn't help so it went back. but i was touched by his generosity. and reminded of the widow who gave all she had. and of the rich young ruler who couldn't bear to part with his money. he is such a simple and awesome young man.
garden paradise
the book 'wild at heart' says 'where the geography around us corresponds with the geography of the heart' if you know me you know i have always had a lot of plants - friends have referred to my house as a jungle. now i am surrounded by them and i don't ever want to leave costa rica. i cannot imagine leaving this garden paradise or living anywhere else now. it is so beautiful.
Monday, June 27, 2005
machete
i bought my own last week. if anyone would've told me that i would be using a machete, never mind buying my own, i would've told them that they were crazy.
recently patricio cut down a tree in the back yard. with a machete. a couple days last week i cut all the branches off. with a machete. a dull one at that. but it's all in the way you use it. it won't cut a banana leaf but it sure goes through a tree branch. i was finished everything else and was bored. it was a good workout and felt good to be able to do it. it just seemed so weird to be doing it. with the different things i've done in my life limbing a tree with a machete was never one i had envisioned before.
i'm definitely having some very cool experiences here.
recently patricio cut down a tree in the back yard. with a machete. a couple days last week i cut all the branches off. with a machete. a dull one at that. but it's all in the way you use it. it won't cut a banana leaf but it sure goes through a tree branch. i was finished everything else and was bored. it was a good workout and felt good to be able to do it. it just seemed so weird to be doing it. with the different things i've done in my life limbing a tree with a machete was never one i had envisioned before.
i'm definitely having some very cool experiences here.
gardens
the students at the local school planted fruits and vegetables last friday. if their garden is successful it would be a good model to show the other schools on the frontier. she said there were lots of papas in the garden on thursday. either they were dads that came to till the soil for the kids to sow seeds the next day or there were a lot of potatoes, papas in español.
also xinia, a teacher in amparo, has asked the city council for property to build a coop garden, as well as a man that lives in san jose but has property in amparo. city council has said yes and has even said that someone will come with a tractor to clear the land and till the soil.
that is so cool. what seems so simple for me because i've had gardens before is quite exciting for people who haven't the first idea what to do or how to do it.
it's also a great way to use up the garbage. now if only we could find a solution to dispose of the plastic, glass and tin.
also xinia, a teacher in amparo, has asked the city council for property to build a coop garden, as well as a man that lives in san jose but has property in amparo. city council has said yes and has even said that someone will come with a tractor to clear the land and till the soil.
that is so cool. what seems so simple for me because i've had gardens before is quite exciting for people who haven't the first idea what to do or how to do it.
it's also a great way to use up the garbage. now if only we could find a solution to dispose of the plastic, glass and tin.
testify to love
it has bothered me that i haven't been able to learn more of the language. i have wondered how i could fulfill the great commission, how could i share God's love with others if i can't communicate in their language.
but this morning coming here on the bus i was listening to ''testify to love'' by avalon. some of the words are ''i'll be a witness in the silences when words are not enough''
well my words aren't enough because i'm not fluent but as i thought of this other words came to mind ''every simple act of mercy''
yesterday i was very uncomfortable when someone was telling me i was such a good person. i said i wasn't but that it was God that lives in me. i couldn't speak his language but i understood what he was saying. so when we think our words aren't enough or we don't know the words to say, let our actions speak for us. let our simple acts of mercy be our witness, our testimony.
but this morning coming here on the bus i was listening to ''testify to love'' by avalon. some of the words are ''i'll be a witness in the silences when words are not enough''
well my words aren't enough because i'm not fluent but as i thought of this other words came to mind ''every simple act of mercy''
yesterday i was very uncomfortable when someone was telling me i was such a good person. i said i wasn't but that it was God that lives in me. i couldn't speak his language but i understood what he was saying. so when we think our words aren't enough or we don't know the words to say, let our actions speak for us. let our simple acts of mercy be our witness, our testimony.
unbelievable
left the internet in san jose friday afternoon when the thunder and lightning started and 20 minutes later i was walking ankle deep through a river that had been the street. it rained so hard so fast it was unbelievable. streets everywhere had been turned to rivers.
i was more afraid to spend the weekend by myself with a family that doesn't speak any english but friday we talked for 6 hours straight and had no problem at all. i couldn't believe it.
saturday we went to the mall and it was dry when we got out of the taxi and by the time we walked inside huricane force winds were blowing the rain horizontally 30 feet into the inside of the mall and sending chairs and buggies that were 40 feet inside flying. some women were screaming. it was wild. it was unbelievable.
everyone says it rains so hard like that every day in the winter. it's nice in the morning and rains every afternoon.
sunday afternoon leaving san carlos when the rain started it got so bad that our bus turned around and headed back to the terminal and then we took a detour home because the heavy rains and flooding had caused a cave in and washed away the road.
the unbelievable part is that the whole country isn't under water. the next morning things are dry and most of the water is gone. then it starts all over again in the afternoon.
i was more afraid to spend the weekend by myself with a family that doesn't speak any english but friday we talked for 6 hours straight and had no problem at all. i couldn't believe it.
saturday we went to the mall and it was dry when we got out of the taxi and by the time we walked inside huricane force winds were blowing the rain horizontally 30 feet into the inside of the mall and sending chairs and buggies that were 40 feet inside flying. some women were screaming. it was wild. it was unbelievable.
everyone says it rains so hard like that every day in the winter. it's nice in the morning and rains every afternoon.
sunday afternoon leaving san carlos when the rain started it got so bad that our bus turned around and headed back to the terminal and then we took a detour home because the heavy rains and flooding had caused a cave in and washed away the road.
the unbelievable part is that the whole country isn't under water. the next morning things are dry and most of the water is gone. then it starts all over again in the afternoon.
unsettled
went to san jose for the weekend by myself and when i got off the bus i walked about 10 blocks to the store and when i took my backpack off to pay for my purchase EVERY single zipper was open on my backpack. i just about freaked. luckily the top item was food and that was the only thing missing. my fanny pack, with my money, passport, visa, etc., that was in my backpack, right below the food, was intact, as well as my cd player. i did feel what i thought was a tug but there was no one there and i only paused very briefly at corners to check for cars before crossing the streets. i was stunned, if 1 or 2 zippers had been opened it would've been one thing but 6 zippers were wide open and i had been walking for who knows how long with them all open. i couldn't believe it.
everyone asked if i was afraid but i wasn't, it was just a very unsettled feeling, but not fear or worry. now the family says they won't let me come here alone again.
everyone asked if i was afraid but i wasn't, it was just a very unsettled feeling, but not fear or worry. now the family says they won't let me come here alone again.
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
well so much for resting
worked like a dog cleaning, clearing and planting the back property for a garden. then got a cold and spent a couple days in bed and now i'm bored out of my mind with nothing to do.
the friend i was teaching english to and learning spanish from got another job, she's not one to sit still either, so she's not around in the day time anymore.
i need a job of some kind but haven't a clue what to do. talked to olga at el ministerio de salud about gardening in the schools and told her i wanted to help with that. she liked that idea but nothing has developed yet.
going to visit a friend that lives near the pacific for a change of scenery. it will be quite a change, from a houseful of almost boys to a houseful of almost all girls. and they don't speak english. i learn so much more when no one speaks english. don't know how long i'll stay, there's less to do there than there is in amparo but who knows.
the friend i was teaching english to and learning spanish from got another job, she's not one to sit still either, so she's not around in the day time anymore.
i need a job of some kind but haven't a clue what to do. talked to olga at el ministerio de salud about gardening in the schools and told her i wanted to help with that. she liked that idea but nothing has developed yet.
going to visit a friend that lives near the pacific for a change of scenery. it will be quite a change, from a houseful of almost boys to a houseful of almost all girls. and they don't speak english. i learn so much more when no one speaks english. don't know how long i'll stay, there's less to do there than there is in amparo but who knows.
Wednesday, June 08, 2005
day to day living
the first 6 months i was here i kept wanting to do and without something to do i guess i was anxious. this time i haven't wondered what to do. i just live each day as it comes. 2 days ago i was walking at the airstrip where i love spending quiet time with God. i thought i don't have to do anything. i have spent the last 40 years working every day. i think i am here to rest, just to rest in God. i have never sat around mondays to fridays and just had coffee in the morning and had a leisurely day. this is like day to day life for a stay at home mom. mimi and i get up at whatever time, it varies from 5 a.m. to 9 a.m., do a chore or two, then sit around and have coffee and talk, then do more work. laundry, cleaning, cooking, dishes is non-stop for a family of 9. it's not that i'm not doing anything. yesterday i raked the front yard, about an acre. i have turned the back yard into a vegetable garden. i'm doing more physical work and loving it. but i don't feel anxious because i'm not doing something outside the home.
i am not anxious waiting to do something for God. He hasn't asked me to do anything. He has told me i am here for a year. for now i am living life, each day, as it comes. after that who knows. when He has plans for me He will tell me.
1 or 2 days a week i go to a friends house and i am teaching her english and she and her family are helping me to learn español.
olga, a friend that works for the ministry of health, has asked if i will help her with a drug program in the schools.
it rains an awful lot so i ended up buying gumboots just so i could walk in the street. man they are so ugly. the boys all laughed at me the first time i wore them. shorts and gumboots. hm.
i am not anxious waiting to do something for God. He hasn't asked me to do anything. He has told me i am here for a year. for now i am living life, each day, as it comes. after that who knows. when He has plans for me He will tell me.
1 or 2 days a week i go to a friends house and i am teaching her english and she and her family are helping me to learn español.
olga, a friend that works for the ministry of health, has asked if i will help her with a drug program in the schools.
it rains an awful lot so i ended up buying gumboots just so i could walk in the street. man they are so ugly. the boys all laughed at me the first time i wore them. shorts and gumboots. hm.
Thursday, June 02, 2005
we exist...
to worship God. we were not created to worship anyone or anything else. if anything is coming before God in your life you are not experiencing the exquisite joy of the most intimate only perfect relationsihp. He created me, He knows me more intimately than any other because He's in my very being. He's the air that i breathe. no other could fill me or love me so completely.
perceptions
you think someone is different, that they've changed, but maybe it's just your perception of them that's different and maybe your perception isn't really yours but a lie the enemy would have you believe. do you really trust yourself, your thoughts, your feelings? your imperfect self? or do you trust in the only one perfect One? how many times have you been wrong? He never is, never has been and never will be.
propaganda
the enemy's messages sent to demoralize us. 2 years ago after coming home from costa rica i did a nosedive. i had a depression and thoughts of suicde. i was a loser, a failure, i had let God down. boy if he wanted to demoralize me he sure did and i let him. before becoming a christian i had suffered years of depression. when i clued in to taking every thought captive to God (thanks howard) i was lifted up and restored. obviously that's something i still need to work on - every day.
i was feeling very unloved a couple of days ago. i was feeling down about it until i told satan to get lost and that i wasn't going to believe his lies. it worked. i wonder how many hurt feelings and relationsihps there are because we have believed the enemies lies.
feeling very unloved and wanting a husband to hold me, love me, protect me. but then i think how very deeply and perfectly loved i truly am and realize it's another lie the enemy would have me believe.
wow! how many sad broken hearts, lonely, hurting people are out there. sure we all want someone to love but it's a lie we've all believed that we are unloved or unloveable. we are loved by and love the most perfect love ever created. if the enemy can get us to believe that we hurt, are sad or lonely. it's like he's getting us to dismiss the one perfect love. God is the source of our joy. God completes us - no other can. He has created us with the desire for love and the enemy uses it against us to make us believe with out something tangible we are incomplete, thus lonely.
today i have gone from thinking someone doesn't love me, that i know does, to feeling lonely because i am single. they are both lies. both thoughts and feelings made me feel sad. until i took them to the cross, to the truth, to God, to my love, my joy, my strength, my truth. truth is - i am single. truth is - i am not alone. i am only lonely if i choose to believe that and don't talk to my one true love. i still want something tangible but i am not incomplete.
i was feeling very unloved a couple of days ago. i was feeling down about it until i told satan to get lost and that i wasn't going to believe his lies. it worked. i wonder how many hurt feelings and relationsihps there are because we have believed the enemies lies.
feeling very unloved and wanting a husband to hold me, love me, protect me. but then i think how very deeply and perfectly loved i truly am and realize it's another lie the enemy would have me believe.
wow! how many sad broken hearts, lonely, hurting people are out there. sure we all want someone to love but it's a lie we've all believed that we are unloved or unloveable. we are loved by and love the most perfect love ever created. if the enemy can get us to believe that we hurt, are sad or lonely. it's like he's getting us to dismiss the one perfect love. God is the source of our joy. God completes us - no other can. He has created us with the desire for love and the enemy uses it against us to make us believe with out something tangible we are incomplete, thus lonely.
today i have gone from thinking someone doesn't love me, that i know does, to feeling lonely because i am single. they are both lies. both thoughts and feelings made me feel sad. until i took them to the cross, to the truth, to God, to my love, my joy, my strength, my truth. truth is - i am single. truth is - i am not alone. i am only lonely if i choose to believe that and don't talk to my one true love. i still want something tangible but i am not incomplete.
wild at heart
'there comes a time when you have to leave all that is familiar and go on into the unknown with God. God takes us somewhere to learn things we have to learn.' so many people have asked me what i'm doing here and i have to say basically nothing. when the boys scammed a ride for us into tibas there were 3 other passengers who had also scammed a ride. 1 man asked what i am doing here and as i was thinking of how to answer him dany said she is just with us, to be here with us. have i left all that is familiar to go on a journey with God to learn things i need to learn? i don't know. if w@h is bringing tears to my eyes i wonder what the book written for the women will touch in my heart. what is God trying to teach me? what does He want me to see? what does He want me to let go of? the fact that i'm crying about it makes me wonder if there's something. i know i have a wound but i believe God has healed them all. the book goes on to say 'if you have no clue as to what your false self my be then a starting point would be to ask those you live with and work with. scary. 'if you never say a word in a meeting for fear of saying something stupid' yup.
i don't know why i cry. is it just because i'm a mush or is there something deeper at work here? i was wounded but God has healed my heartache.
i was told that our first memory is what defines us - my first memory is when my mother abandoned me when i was five. i know now that Jesus will never leave me.
w@h is a good read. can't wait to read the one for women. all the times when i have felt out of sync with God i have thought it was from sin i had committed. i have asked the Holy Spirit to reveal whatever was blocking my relationship with God. i must have sinned so i need to repent to bridge the gap i feel. i never thought of it like this before but let's give credit where credit is due. satan, the destroyer, the deceiver, the enemy, taking out the line of communication i have with my beloved Father. thankfully although i don't recognize it for what it could be the Holy Spirit knows i need to be close to God and helps me and restores me. frequently, like 99 per cent of the time, my mind wanders and while i am talking to God i start wondering what i'¡m going to do today, what ¡'m going to wear, about all the things i think i have to do, etc. sometimes i let the enemy win. i have wondered about so many other things i have stopped talking to God. other times i have rebuked the enemy and i have cotinued talking to my Beloved. nothing and no one is as important to me as God is and if i am not feeling in constant communion with Him i need to do whatever it takes to restore our relationship.
like the quote from oswald chambers 'sometimes there is nothing to obey, the only thing to do is to maintain a vital connection with Jesus Christ, to see that nothing interferes with that.' that is life - without it i am nothing.
i don't know why i cry. is it just because i'm a mush or is there something deeper at work here? i was wounded but God has healed my heartache.
i was told that our first memory is what defines us - my first memory is when my mother abandoned me when i was five. i know now that Jesus will never leave me.
w@h is a good read. can't wait to read the one for women. all the times when i have felt out of sync with God i have thought it was from sin i had committed. i have asked the Holy Spirit to reveal whatever was blocking my relationship with God. i must have sinned so i need to repent to bridge the gap i feel. i never thought of it like this before but let's give credit where credit is due. satan, the destroyer, the deceiver, the enemy, taking out the line of communication i have with my beloved Father. thankfully although i don't recognize it for what it could be the Holy Spirit knows i need to be close to God and helps me and restores me. frequently, like 99 per cent of the time, my mind wanders and while i am talking to God i start wondering what i'¡m going to do today, what ¡'m going to wear, about all the things i think i have to do, etc. sometimes i let the enemy win. i have wondered about so many other things i have stopped talking to God. other times i have rebuked the enemy and i have cotinued talking to my Beloved. nothing and no one is as important to me as God is and if i am not feeling in constant communion with Him i need to do whatever it takes to restore our relationship.
like the quote from oswald chambers 'sometimes there is nothing to obey, the only thing to do is to maintain a vital connection with Jesus Christ, to see that nothing interferes with that.' that is life - without it i am nothing.
internet in los chiles
the internet cafe is full of brand new equipment yet it sits empty. i don't know why but now the only internet i can get to is in san carlos about a 3 hour bus ride away so i won't be on line very often. roy, the operator, left los chiles to work elsewhere and sady has closed the internet. i don't know if it's a line problem or another problem that she doesn't understand how to fix. i don't know when or if it will ever re-open.
the Lord's discipline
reading in touch magazine about how God disciplines His children. i can't say that i have recognized His divine discipline when He has corrected me in the past but i certainly do now. i feel close to Him, i feel Him in my life, His presence, all the time. except when i sin. although i know that He is still there i don't feel His closeness, like He has withdrawn from me. it's the aloneness, emptiness i feel without Him that brings me to repentance. He is my dearly beloved and until i tell Him i'm sorry and ask for forgiveness my heart aches in His silence. and when He forgives me and restores me my heart aches in joy in His sweet love.
big game
well we got to the game 10 minutes before it ended. there was an accident on a hairpin curve that stopped traffic for 7 1-2 hours. a truck had lost it's load and spilled it all over the highway. finally when smaller vehicles were able to get through dany and jonny scammed a ride in a car. our bus driver must have been helping at the accident scene because we never saw him again. i had left los chiles at 11 a.m. and we arrived in tibas (saprissa stadium near san jose) almost 11 hours later. we were able to see the last 10 minutes of the game on a tv outside the stadium.
Monday, May 16, 2005
saprissa vs liga
tonight is the championship game between the top two teams in costa rica. i have to go san jose to get the stuff i left at patri's house (the oldest daughter) which i had expected to get the day after i arrived. so since i have to go anyway and need someone to help me, dany, jonny, marcos and i will go to the game.
weight restrictions
each piece of luggage is only supposed to weight 50#. anything over that and you have to pay extra. i knew i was going to be over so sushi said if i was going to have to pay if i was over a couple of pounds i may as well make it worthwhile. well i was definitely over, i knew i was i just didn't know how much. my suitcase was 60#, the box was 96#. it was an extra $130 so you really have to watch your weight.
feel like a kid
every time i get on a plane. i like sitting in the window seat so i can look out. this time i flew america west airlines and i don't know if we took off in a different direction or if it was daylight this time or just not raining or what but it was beautiful looking out over vancouver. we flew into phoenix - man it is huge freaking airport. miles of moving sidewalks.
sweats on again
i brought a thermostat with me and yesterday it was 36 degrees in the livingroom. while i was in canada the doctor told me that when you live in a hot country your blood thins which explains why when you return to a cold country you freeze. toothpaste and other creams in a tube just about leak out of the tube they are so thinned out. when i came home i almost had to use both hands to squeeze anything out of the tubes because they were so thick.
sorry if i'm not making any sense i haven't been able to fully wake up yet.
sorry if i'm not making any sense i haven't been able to fully wake up yet.
home again
the family didn't have any money so there was no one here to meet me at the airport. after waiting for a half hour i phoned home and they told me. no problema because i have always told them i am a big girl and can find my way home. i stayed at the hotel alajuela and took the first bus home the next morning, getting up at 4 a.m. i have only had about 4 hours sleep every night for the past week so i have been walking about in a fog for a few days. i still am. as i was dozing on the bus someone tussled my hair and i looked up to see dany smiling down at me. he had taken the bus to santa rosa to meet me. it was so good to see him.
Friday, May 06, 2005
when will i ever learn
people have asked me what i'm going to do in costa rica when i return. i thought i knew. i had it all figured out. then one morning i woke up and felt like i was out of sync with God. when that happens i know i've said or done something i shouldn't have and i need to take care of it in order to be right with God. i didn't swear, get drunk or have illicit sex. so what was it. i couldn't think of what it was so i had to ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to me what was causing me to feel this way.
arrogance. i was making all these plans. how can God use us if we plan everything instead of letting things happen according to God's plan. whoa! i thought oh crap. i went from knowing what i was going to do to not having a clue again and having to wait on God. i liked the idea that i knew what i was going to do. i didn't like the idea that i had no idea. God doesn't tell me things way in advance. He makes me wait until the very last minute.
when i realized my sin against God i started to cry and instantly (it was very weird, snap your fingers instantly) He gave me peace, dried my tears and restored me to Himself.
have i not learned anything? i even have it in my sidebar 'about me' - i have no idea what i will do or where i will live (here i mean in costa rica) but i know God has a plan for me and will tell me when i need to know...
i hate that. i hate not knowing. i still don't have any doubts or fears or worries so i'll just go and let it all unfold according to God's plan.
arrogance. i was making all these plans. how can God use us if we plan everything instead of letting things happen according to God's plan. whoa! i thought oh crap. i went from knowing what i was going to do to not having a clue again and having to wait on God. i liked the idea that i knew what i was going to do. i didn't like the idea that i had no idea. God doesn't tell me things way in advance. He makes me wait until the very last minute.
when i realized my sin against God i started to cry and instantly (it was very weird, snap your fingers instantly) He gave me peace, dried my tears and restored me to Himself.
have i not learned anything? i even have it in my sidebar 'about me' - i have no idea what i will do or where i will live (here i mean in costa rica) but i know God has a plan for me and will tell me when i need to know...
i hate that. i hate not knowing. i still don't have any doubts or fears or worries so i'll just go and let it all unfold according to God's plan.
truly, madly, deeply
i have fallen more in love with God than i thought possible. i don't think that before i went to costa rica i would have been as content with my singleness as i am now. i am a very touchy, feely kind of person and have wanted to share my life with a husband. i can still say i would like to have a husband but it is no longer something to be mourned over if i don't. and besides the bar is too high now for almost anyone. i'm so in love with God it would be hard for anyone to live up to that. only someone that loves God more than me, someone that would give their all to God, someone totally surrendered to God would ever come close.
faith
is God testing yours? has He asked you to do something you don't want to do? when we are faithful the enemy will attack us with a vengeance trying to destroy our faith. God is stronger though and when we are on our knees He will lift us up. as the bible says we really do need to take every thought captive to Christ.
who's in charge
people seem to be forgetting that God is the one that's in charge.
what we need to remember is that nothing can happen to any one of us that God does not allow. whatever our circumstances are God is the one in control. if we are going through a tough time He knows. i can't explain why bad things happen to good people except that God must have a good reason for it. He is perfect, His will is perfect and His timing is perfect. circumstances may not be what we would choose for ourselves or our friends or family but God really does work things out for good for those who love Him. we may not understand it and we may not like it but we have to trust that He loves us more than we could possibly imagine and He knows what we need more than we know ourselves.
instead of complaining about our lives or those of us around us remember that God is fully aware of everything and that He has the final say. if He is allowing hardship in your life you might want to ask why. is He trying to get your attention for something? if you don't like what's happening in yours or a friend's life remember - you're not the one in control. give it up. you don't have it anyway.
what we need to remember is that nothing can happen to any one of us that God does not allow. whatever our circumstances are God is the one in control. if we are going through a tough time He knows. i can't explain why bad things happen to good people except that God must have a good reason for it. He is perfect, His will is perfect and His timing is perfect. circumstances may not be what we would choose for ourselves or our friends or family but God really does work things out for good for those who love Him. we may not understand it and we may not like it but we have to trust that He loves us more than we could possibly imagine and He knows what we need more than we know ourselves.
instead of complaining about our lives or those of us around us remember that God is fully aware of everything and that He has the final say. if He is allowing hardship in your life you might want to ask why. is He trying to get your attention for something? if you don't like what's happening in yours or a friend's life remember - you're not the one in control. give it up. you don't have it anyway.
Monday, April 25, 2005
life in costa rica - josefa's house
josefa is the great-grandmother to 3 young boys, leo is 3, jeffrey is 6 and yrlin is 8. they live in this house where there is no power, no water, dirt floors, no doors, bamboo walls, and corrugated tin walls with black plastic on the top half that blows in with the wind. they have nothing. but they have each other and for them that's everything.
Tuesday, April 05, 2005
changes
soon we will be going back to canada. everyone to their respective homes. except me. i don-t have a home anymore. and i-m not sure how i feel about that. i have always had a place i could call my own. my own bed, my own kitchen, my own bathroom.
today i looked at beautiful art work, scenes of costa rica that i would decorate my home with, if i had one. if i ever have a home of my own again i will have more plants than i have had before, which was a lot. just to recreate the beautiful green space that surrounds me here. i would have tile floors instead of carpeting. i will have less clutter, less meaningless things.
i have always been a beach person but find that it has less appeal for me now. i feel changed but don-t understand it and can-t explain it.
leaving my family in amparo was hard. a tearjerker to say the least. as with every other time in the last six months that i struggled with something i talked to God. He gave me such peace. and as i played english worship music on the van cd player my tears of sadness were replaced with tears of joy in the love i have for my heavenly Father.
when i think of the past 6 months and all the times i-ve wondered why i was here, the ups and downs, should i stay or should i go. what has been the most important for me was that i came closer to God. He has been so awesome. He has taken such good care of me, He has given me everything i have needed. i had thought i had an amazing intimate relationship with God but it has grown deeper than i could have imagined.
have no idea what the next 7 months hold in store for me when i return to costa rica for another 6 months, never mind after that when i return to canada. maybe i will have a home, maybe i will have a bigger suitcase.
march 29, 2005 in touch magazine. don-t have it with me so it-s maybe not an exact quote but goes like - whatever You want Lord, wherever You want Lord, whenever You want Lord, the answer is yes.
today i looked at beautiful art work, scenes of costa rica that i would decorate my home with, if i had one. if i ever have a home of my own again i will have more plants than i have had before, which was a lot. just to recreate the beautiful green space that surrounds me here. i would have tile floors instead of carpeting. i will have less clutter, less meaningless things.
i have always been a beach person but find that it has less appeal for me now. i feel changed but don-t understand it and can-t explain it.
leaving my family in amparo was hard. a tearjerker to say the least. as with every other time in the last six months that i struggled with something i talked to God. He gave me such peace. and as i played english worship music on the van cd player my tears of sadness were replaced with tears of joy in the love i have for my heavenly Father.
when i think of the past 6 months and all the times i-ve wondered why i was here, the ups and downs, should i stay or should i go. what has been the most important for me was that i came closer to God. He has been so awesome. He has taken such good care of me, He has given me everything i have needed. i had thought i had an amazing intimate relationship with God but it has grown deeper than i could have imagined.
have no idea what the next 7 months hold in store for me when i return to costa rica for another 6 months, never mind after that when i return to canada. maybe i will have a home, maybe i will have a bigger suitcase.
march 29, 2005 in touch magazine. don-t have it with me so it-s maybe not an exact quote but goes like - whatever You want Lord, wherever You want Lord, whenever You want Lord, the answer is yes.
Tuesday, March 22, 2005
the team is here
and i am sitting in the internet in los chiles. i have felt very strange with the team today. like i don't belong. dany and i went to san jose yesterday to meet the team and today i am with them. dany and his brothers are my family and i feel more costa rican and feel more like i belong with them than with the team. i have been a mom for the past 6 months and i have to leave them. it doesn't seem right. and i don't know how i'm going to do it. this is my home and they are my family.
and last night dany told me that their soccer championship tournament is this weekend. and i will be with the team and i won't be able to go.
i wonder where God wants me. i know where i want to be and it's not with the team. being with them means i have to leave. and i don't want to.
i know if i want to live for God i have to put aside my wants. and i know He knows the plans He has for me and i know that when He tells me i will want the same thing. but right now i can't imagine leaving my family here.
they are teenaged boys but they are my babies and i love them.
and last night dany told me that their soccer championship tournament is this weekend. and i will be with the team and i won't be able to go.
i wonder where God wants me. i know where i want to be and it's not with the team. being with them means i have to leave. and i don't want to.
i know if i want to live for God i have to put aside my wants. and i know He knows the plans He has for me and i know that when He tells me i will want the same thing. but right now i can't imagine leaving my family here.
they are teenaged boys but they are my babies and i love them.
Monday, March 21, 2005
dany - the newest member of saprissa
it was so cool. got home on friday to learn that saprissa had called dany. jonny got home just before dany and he was so excited he threw his arms around me and hugged me. he was so excited for dany. it was very cool. we had dany's saprissa shirt and hat, his tacos and shorts sitting on a chair outside the house. his dream come true. we are all so very happy for him.
i had told him that morning as we were walking to the bus stop that he wouldn't go to saprissa until after i left. i had thought that saprissa would call him on monday but on thursday and friday i just felt it in my heart that he would still be at home for my last week here next week.
it is so cool to see him so happy. he has played soccer probably almost every day of his life and now to realize his dream - awesome. he is such a good boy.
i had told him that morning as we were walking to the bus stop that he wouldn't go to saprissa until after i left. i had thought that saprissa would call him on monday but on thursday and friday i just felt it in my heart that he would still be at home for my last week here next week.
it is so cool to see him so happy. he has played soccer probably almost every day of his life and now to realize his dream - awesome. he is such a good boy.
Friday, March 18, 2005
i'm a millionaire
or at least i will be by the time i withdraw all the money for the team's expenses and donations. the equivalent in costa rican money will be over 1,000,000 colones. that makes me a millionaire.
i once laughed at a tourist in mexico who purposely withdraw enough pesos to give him a million just so he could say he was a millionaire.
don't get too excited, it's actually less than $3,000.
i once laughed at a tourist in mexico who purposely withdraw enough pesos to give him a million just so he could say he was a millionaire.
don't get too excited, it's actually less than $3,000.
frontera schools
it's so hard to decide which schools are the poorest when they are all so very poor.
went to las delicias yesterday. as i was wandering around outside i noticed that there were no doors on the baños. there were two baños and they faced away from the school but neither one had anything that resembled a door.
i chose one school, el cachito, for the team to go to because when asked what the greatest need was the teacher said food. the kids are hungry and there is no money to buy food. they have a new school building with concrete bathrooms, one for the boys and one for the girls. so does that mean they are better off than the school i went to yesterday?
las delicias has lime and orange trees and banana plants. and power.
el cachito has none of these things.
el coyol that i went to on wednesday - the teacher sleeps in a tent in the classroom and has his kitchen on a plank in the front of the classroom.
the uniforms, tops and bottoms, that most kids had were very shabby, held together with pins, or just left gaping. one girl in el gallito, where i went tuesday, held her shirt together with a bc pin we gave her a few years ago.
kids are wearing shoes that are either very much too large for them, or very much too small and they are cramping their feet to fit into them, or they have none at all.
it looked like some younger kids were wearing pants that would have to last them all their elementary school years. and older kids that looked like they had worn their uniform for several years and had outgrown them. pants and skirts that no longer came together because they had been outgrown.
and yet we had milk and cereal in plastic cups, washed hands, brushed teeth, listened to information about lice, good nutrition, cleanliness, good dental hygiene, malaria, etc. and played games and soccer in the scorching sun, and they were all laughing having a great time.
they are SO poor and have nothing but they had a blast. and so did we.
it's makes me sad to think of all the things we give our kids. most of these kids don't even have power in their villages, never mind a tv and vcr in every room in the house.
went to las delicias yesterday. as i was wandering around outside i noticed that there were no doors on the baños. there were two baños and they faced away from the school but neither one had anything that resembled a door.
i chose one school, el cachito, for the team to go to because when asked what the greatest need was the teacher said food. the kids are hungry and there is no money to buy food. they have a new school building with concrete bathrooms, one for the boys and one for the girls. so does that mean they are better off than the school i went to yesterday?
las delicias has lime and orange trees and banana plants. and power.
el cachito has none of these things.
el coyol that i went to on wednesday - the teacher sleeps in a tent in the classroom and has his kitchen on a plank in the front of the classroom.
the uniforms, tops and bottoms, that most kids had were very shabby, held together with pins, or just left gaping. one girl in el gallito, where i went tuesday, held her shirt together with a bc pin we gave her a few years ago.
kids are wearing shoes that are either very much too large for them, or very much too small and they are cramping their feet to fit into them, or they have none at all.
it looked like some younger kids were wearing pants that would have to last them all their elementary school years. and older kids that looked like they had worn their uniform for several years and had outgrown them. pants and skirts that no longer came together because they had been outgrown.
and yet we had milk and cereal in plastic cups, washed hands, brushed teeth, listened to information about lice, good nutrition, cleanliness, good dental hygiene, malaria, etc. and played games and soccer in the scorching sun, and they were all laughing having a great time.
they are SO poor and have nothing but they had a blast. and so did we.
it's makes me sad to think of all the things we give our kids. most of these kids don't even have power in their villages, never mind a tv and vcr in every room in the house.
the tears have started
i have been looking forward to the team's arrival but as i thought about it two days ago i thought how that would mean i would have to leave here. and i started crying.
prior to coming here i lived alone for 13 years. for the past 6 months i have had a family and i have come to love them.
the boys get up at 5.00 every morning to go to school and i watch them as they walk away from the house. running, if they're late, to catch the bus. four of them come home from school at 4.00 and i have their lunch on the table for them.
it feels really good to have a family and i can't imagine living without them. God told me the 2nd day i was here that i was here for one year. so i know i am coming back after a month but even for that one month i will miss them terribly. even writing about leaving is bringing tears to my eyes and constricting my throat.
when i have gone to san carlos with friends it feels good when we are heading home. i am home and have a home in costa rica. i sold my house in mission. i don't have a home there anymore and have no idea where i will even sleep the night i get home.
yesterday i took an hour and a half walking the usual hour walk home. i talked with God the entire way. i will need His peace and comfort a great deal until i return here.
i am coming home alone on a different flight than the team and wish i could sleep the whole way home so people won't see me crying the whole way.
gotta stop now. i can't keep crying in the internet.
prior to coming here i lived alone for 13 years. for the past 6 months i have had a family and i have come to love them.
the boys get up at 5.00 every morning to go to school and i watch them as they walk away from the house. running, if they're late, to catch the bus. four of them come home from school at 4.00 and i have their lunch on the table for them.
it feels really good to have a family and i can't imagine living without them. God told me the 2nd day i was here that i was here for one year. so i know i am coming back after a month but even for that one month i will miss them terribly. even writing about leaving is bringing tears to my eyes and constricting my throat.
when i have gone to san carlos with friends it feels good when we are heading home. i am home and have a home in costa rica. i sold my house in mission. i don't have a home there anymore and have no idea where i will even sleep the night i get home.
yesterday i took an hour and a half walking the usual hour walk home. i talked with God the entire way. i will need His peace and comfort a great deal until i return here.
i am coming home alone on a different flight than the team and wish i could sleep the whole way home so people won't see me crying the whole way.
gotta stop now. i can't keep crying in the internet.
Thursday, March 10, 2005
saprissa
dany has survived the next cut for saprissa. he got home from the hospital on tuesday and tuesday night saprissa called him again to come the next day to san jose. jose told them dany had been in hospital for a week and when dany practiced with them yesterday they said they knew how he played and that he only had to play for 1-2 hour. the boys were told that if they got called again within the week that would mean they had made it, they would be saprissa players. i am pretty sure he will make it. they practiced against the real saprissa players and although dany is very good and very fast he was amazed at how fast they were.
he is back at school today and tomorrow and has a math exam on monday. after that i think he will be moving to san jose to live there. to train and play for saprissa and go to school.
he has such a tender heart for God and i think God is blessing him with this opportunity and he will be able to help his family. and he will be living with his brother marcos and marcos attends an awesome church.
needless to say everyone is very excited about it.
he is back at school today and tomorrow and has a math exam on monday. after that i think he will be moving to san jose to live there. to train and play for saprissa and go to school.
he has such a tender heart for God and i think God is blessing him with this opportunity and he will be able to help his family. and he will be living with his brother marcos and marcos attends an awesome church.
needless to say everyone is very excited about it.
food poisoning
dany and i got sick from eating or drinking something while we were in san jose. he spent the week in hospital while i spent the week at a friends house. i've been sick here twice now, although never in the north, but i never leave home without drugs for 'montezuma's revenge' i was feeling better in a few hours after taking what my doctor had given me. dany was a pincushion for a week while they took tests to figure out what was wrong with him.
jaco
is a lot bigger than quepos. and it has grown since i was here a few years ago. i spent most of my time reading. there is a book exchange place where you can turn one book in and get a used one at half price. a couple of grisham novels for a couple of bucks.
there were a few surprises this year, none of which i enjoyed. there was a big fight on the beach. as i learned later there were some people that had come from san jose without money and wanted to get into the hotel. it got very ugly and the police were called.
then there was an american guy telling an english guy that his job was to get him whores and lots of booze. they disgusted me. they had a spanish girl with them that didn't speak any english and she was drunk most of the time. they made some remarks to me and i ignored them.
while standing in line a costa rican approached me and asked if i was married and then asked if i would like to go to bed with him. his approach was very matter of fact and was less offensive and vulgar than the american and english guys.
and there was a girl laying topless on the beach.
i was happy to leave there.
the waves looked wonderful but i was raised to never swim alone so i never went in.
there were a few surprises this year, none of which i enjoyed. there was a big fight on the beach. as i learned later there were some people that had come from san jose without money and wanted to get into the hotel. it got very ugly and the police were called.
then there was an american guy telling an english guy that his job was to get him whores and lots of booze. they disgusted me. they had a spanish girl with them that didn't speak any english and she was drunk most of the time. they made some remarks to me and i ignored them.
while standing in line a costa rican approached me and asked if i was married and then asked if i would like to go to bed with him. his approach was very matter of fact and was less offensive and vulgar than the american and english guys.
and there was a girl laying topless on the beach.
i was happy to leave there.
the waves looked wonderful but i was raised to never swim alone so i never went in.
Saturday, March 05, 2005
quepos last night
the beach was filled with noisy, north americans talking about money, how to spend it, how to make more and how to induce others to spend more. i thought they were rather arrogant and i was uncomfortable in their presence, in the internet and when i went for something to eat.
unencumbered by my backpack and suitcase i walked through town to where i found the ticos playing soccer. way more fun.
this am i walked to where the locals set up their open street market and bought some of the weird looking fruit i saw the bus driver pick off the trees yesterday. i have no idea what they are but they are edible. i have to buy a knife so i'll find out later. i felt like a tica.
it wasn't that long ago that i would've been one of the party-goers. i don't know if it's an age thing (don't think so) or that i feel that this is my home and north americans (for the most part) come here for 2 weeks, party like crazy, with a very me first attitude and very little regard for the locals. it's good that they want to dump their money into the local economy though.
unencumbered by my backpack and suitcase i walked through town to where i found the ticos playing soccer. way more fun.
this am i walked to where the locals set up their open street market and bought some of the weird looking fruit i saw the bus driver pick off the trees yesterday. i have no idea what they are but they are edible. i have to buy a knife so i'll find out later. i felt like a tica.
it wasn't that long ago that i would've been one of the party-goers. i don't know if it's an age thing (don't think so) or that i feel that this is my home and north americans (for the most part) come here for 2 weeks, party like crazy, with a very me first attitude and very little regard for the locals. it's good that they want to dump their money into the local economy though.
Friday, March 04, 2005
bus ride through the mountains of costa rica
i sometimes wonder why i do things and wonder if i'm not out of my mind. i used to be so sensible and practical. now i find myself going off on different adventures with no goal in mind and wonder what i will find at the end of the road.
i have spent the last few days visiting a friend in puriscal who was returning to canada today. she offered to drive me east to san jose where i could catch a bus to jaco that would've taken 2 hours.
rather than go with her i wanted to see a bit of the country i hadn't seen yet so i decided to take a bus from puriscal heading west to jaco. while i sat at the bus stop waiting for the bus i realized i had no plan. although i knew where the bus was going i didn't know where that was or what to expect or do when i got there. i started getting a little nervous but it was too late to back out cuz my friend was long gone.
i wondered where God was in this plan of mine. was He also shaking His head wondering if i was out of my mind. i wasn't doing anything for Him. i was just taking off on my own.
it was so incredibly beautiful it brought tears to my eyes on several occasions. this country is so beautiful it really touches my heart and it really feels like this is my home. i don't know where i belong anymore but this sure feels like it. we passed through the mountains over gravel roads that had steep banks on one side and dropped off to lush, verdant valleys on the other side. sometimes the road was at the top of the mountain so there were steep dropoffs on both sides. or we passed through dense jungle that closed in on us. we stopped once for a bathroom break and 3 times for the bus driver to stop and pick fruit from the trees at the side of the road. it was so simple and peaceful. God has made this an incredible garden and i want to live in His garden.
when we got to the highway the bus turned south and the first signs i saw a sign that said 23 kms to quepos (which is where i knew the bus was headed) and 45 kms to jaco (north which was my actual destination).
panic set in. we passed a large community and i thought how i started out with no plan and i was now heading away from where i wanted to go. i had expected a quiet little village where it wouldn't be hard to find a place to spend the night. then as usual God's amazing peace settled on me. i wonder if He was shaking His head at me as i was at myself.
it was past 5:30 when we arrived here in quepos and it's dark just after 6 and i have a heavy suitcase (i really have to learn to travel light) and a backpack so i knew i needed to find a hotel first.
i don't know what the population is here but it's filled with tourists and it's a large noisy beach town. i would rather be back on the dusty mountain road with the locals. i would rather spend time with ticos than listen to the tourists talking about gambling and real estate and cruising and fishing.
tomorrow morning i will head up to jaco. it's also a tourist beach town but it's much smaller, at least it was 3 years ago.
when i go back to san jose in a couple of days i would rather take the bus back through the mountains. even though it took over 4 hours and the other way is only 2 hours the drive it well worth it.
most tourists come here for the beaches but there is so much more to costa rica than the beaches that most tourists never see. the beaches actually pale in comparison to the beauty of where i was this afternoon.
if i had doubts about whether i was coming back here after going home for a month i don't now.
i have spent the last few days visiting a friend in puriscal who was returning to canada today. she offered to drive me east to san jose where i could catch a bus to jaco that would've taken 2 hours.
rather than go with her i wanted to see a bit of the country i hadn't seen yet so i decided to take a bus from puriscal heading west to jaco. while i sat at the bus stop waiting for the bus i realized i had no plan. although i knew where the bus was going i didn't know where that was or what to expect or do when i got there. i started getting a little nervous but it was too late to back out cuz my friend was long gone.
i wondered where God was in this plan of mine. was He also shaking His head wondering if i was out of my mind. i wasn't doing anything for Him. i was just taking off on my own.
it was so incredibly beautiful it brought tears to my eyes on several occasions. this country is so beautiful it really touches my heart and it really feels like this is my home. i don't know where i belong anymore but this sure feels like it. we passed through the mountains over gravel roads that had steep banks on one side and dropped off to lush, verdant valleys on the other side. sometimes the road was at the top of the mountain so there were steep dropoffs on both sides. or we passed through dense jungle that closed in on us. we stopped once for a bathroom break and 3 times for the bus driver to stop and pick fruit from the trees at the side of the road. it was so simple and peaceful. God has made this an incredible garden and i want to live in His garden.
when we got to the highway the bus turned south and the first signs i saw a sign that said 23 kms to quepos (which is where i knew the bus was headed) and 45 kms to jaco (north which was my actual destination).
panic set in. we passed a large community and i thought how i started out with no plan and i was now heading away from where i wanted to go. i had expected a quiet little village where it wouldn't be hard to find a place to spend the night. then as usual God's amazing peace settled on me. i wonder if He was shaking His head at me as i was at myself.
it was past 5:30 when we arrived here in quepos and it's dark just after 6 and i have a heavy suitcase (i really have to learn to travel light) and a backpack so i knew i needed to find a hotel first.
i don't know what the population is here but it's filled with tourists and it's a large noisy beach town. i would rather be back on the dusty mountain road with the locals. i would rather spend time with ticos than listen to the tourists talking about gambling and real estate and cruising and fishing.
tomorrow morning i will head up to jaco. it's also a tourist beach town but it's much smaller, at least it was 3 years ago.
when i go back to san jose in a couple of days i would rather take the bus back through the mountains. even though it took over 4 hours and the other way is only 2 hours the drive it well worth it.
most tourists come here for the beaches but there is so much more to costa rica than the beaches that most tourists never see. the beaches actually pale in comparison to the beauty of where i was this afternoon.
if i had doubts about whether i was coming back here after going home for a month i don't now.
Thursday, March 03, 2005
tremors
having breakfast monday morning in san jose and i could hear this loud roar like a freight train coming through. it was a minor earthquake. not enough to shake the house but i guess they are regular enough to relieve pressure so there is no big quake. when i arrived in desamparaditos de puriscal there were several more and nobody pays any attention to them.
scorpions
well i've had spiders as big as my fist on the wall beside my bed, and we've had a coral snake on the floor on the way to the bathroom and now a scorpion. there was a scorpion on the floor of the house where i am visiting and the man of the house stepped barefoot on it. i told him it was a scorpion. he did it again. i told him it was poisonous and he put a sandal on and moved it outside. he is danish and didn't know about scorpions.
training camp
turns out that the team that dany would train with is in a tournament and won't be around for his age group to train with so dany went home and is waiting to be called back and i am visiting with a retired cdn teacher i met last year with world vision.
wait
i was crying this am as i was talking to God - wondering about coming back here after i go home for a month, where will i go, what will i do. as i was crying God covered me with His amazing peace and it was like wait - I know the plans I have for you. wait - I will tell you when you need to know.
i have been learning patience here but sometimes it's hard and i see that i still have such a long way to go.
i have been learning patience here but sometimes it's hard and i see that i still have such a long way to go.
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
guatemala
it sounded exciting to go and at first i thought God might be opening a new mission field but don't feel that anymore. don't know what He has in store but do feel He has more for me to do here. July is a long way off though. He always tells me what He wants me to do but in my impatience i try to rush ahead of Him. i should know better because every time He proves that His timing is way better than mine.
the refri
it must be a God thing that the new (used) one didn't work, the guy wanted 80,000 col. they told the guy that brings old refri's from the us that it didn't work and he agreed that they didn't have to pay for it. we got a guy to come to the house to fix it and it only cost 7k, about $21. the door shelves didn't have fronts on them so they made bars using aluminum from the old tv antenna.
property for sale
in amparo, with a house, about 5 acres. 6 millones, in cdn about $5,000. and it's contiguous to the airstrip, my garden. the owner called to me as i was walking home to tell me about it. it is very tempting but if i'm only here for a year???
dany
IS GOING TO SAPRISSA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
saprissa just happens to be the boys favourite soccer team.
yesterday they phoned the house to ask him to come to training camp. i sat down and cried at the thought of him not being here. i love all of them but dany is my baby. jose said it is for 45 days and then saprissa will choose 23 of the boys to join saprissa.
you should've seen the happy faces last night. and the phone was busy all night, either calling to tell people or people that already knew calling to congratulate him.
friday i am going to go with dany and we are going to live at marco's house just south of san pedro. jose said they will put him in school but he doesn't get paid anything to be in training.
i don't know how many boys it's been pared down to but when we went in december for tryouts there were thousands of boys from all over cr.
the family has been praying for this for dany, not only because it has been his dream, but because they said he can then help support the family.
saprissa just happens to be the boys favourite soccer team.
yesterday they phoned the house to ask him to come to training camp. i sat down and cried at the thought of him not being here. i love all of them but dany is my baby. jose said it is for 45 days and then saprissa will choose 23 of the boys to join saprissa.
you should've seen the happy faces last night. and the phone was busy all night, either calling to tell people or people that already knew calling to congratulate him.
friday i am going to go with dany and we are going to live at marco's house just south of san pedro. jose said they will put him in school but he doesn't get paid anything to be in training.
i don't know how many boys it's been pared down to but when we went in december for tryouts there were thousands of boys from all over cr.
the family has been praying for this for dany, not only because it has been his dream, but because they said he can then help support the family.
Friday, February 18, 2005
policia
got stopped by a cop last night on my way home from the internet. i was here til 10:00 (8:00 mission time). he asked me several questions, then asked for my passport. thoughts of crawling under the barbed wire into nicaragua crossed my mind as he was questioning me but he was just curious cuz almost no one is on the street that late because they all get up so early here.
fox
there was a noise in mimi's bedroom and i thought it was the puppy. dany went to get the puppy but it turned out to be a fox. not sure how it got in though cuz the window is pretty high. he came out for the machete but the fox was gone when he went back in.
we get all kinds of critters in the house. we get these things that are like the scarabs in the 'mummy' or indiana jones movies. they fly and crawl around.
last week there was a spider in my room and dany went to kill it. he came out and apologized that he missed getting the 'world's biggest spider'. i missed seeing that one but just knowing it was there i sat down in the kitchen and cried and prayed. i couldn't go back in my room but as i prayed God gave me the courage and peace to go to bed that night.
we get all kinds of critters in the house. we get these things that are like the scarabs in the 'mummy' or indiana jones movies. they fly and crawl around.
last week there was a spider in my room and dany went to kill it. he came out and apologized that he missed getting the 'world's biggest spider'. i missed seeing that one but just knowing it was there i sat down in the kitchen and cried and prayed. i couldn't go back in my room but as i prayed God gave me the courage and peace to go to bed that night.
graceful
i walked home one day behind a woman carrying a big sack of rice on her head (8 kms in the hot sun). as i watched her walk i thought how graceful she looked and thought about a model that was vying for the title of miss costa rica. the contestant for miss cr actually crossed her feet over about 5 inches as she walked. the boys were all laughing as she forcefully made her way down the runway. there was nothing graceful about it. she was a bone rack and all her beauty was artificial and painted on. the woman with the sack of rice on her head had a natural beauty and grace about her.
i can't imagine living a life where there is such an abundance of food yet you starve yourself to 'look beautiful'. and the rest of us buy into it.
i can't imagine living a life where there is such an abundance of food yet you starve yourself to 'look beautiful'. and the rest of us buy into it.
orange peelers
last week a little 7 year old girl just about cut her finger off trying to peel an orange. they use knives and when i asked about a 7 year old using a sharp knife, it's like they all do. if you have any tupperware orange peelers would you like to donate them to the kids in costa rica. i don't know that they would use them and they may get wasted but... it's hard to change the culture.
washing machines
another thing we take for granted. this morning i washed 4 days worth of my clothes by hand. then i hung them on the line, in front of the house for all the neighbours to see. i tried to hang them in the back but vicki wanted me to hang them in the front because there is more wind there and they will dry faster.
Thursday, February 17, 2005
toilet paper
i'm wondering - if you don't have money for food would you waste money on toilet paper. you're just going to burn it anyway.
we learned the first year we were here that you never travel throughout costa rica without toilet paper.
last year when i was in the hospital there was no toilet paper even there. thankfully it's always in my backpack.
just another one of the many things we take for granted.
we learned the first year we were here that you never travel throughout costa rica without toilet paper.
last year when i was in the hospital there was no toilet paper even there. thankfully it's always in my backpack.
just another one of the many things we take for granted.
home in los chiles
i have occasionally stayed with one family in los chiles and i have stayed in the motel here (it's expensive though). i have been looking for a place of my own but when school started all the teachers came back to town for the school year so all the places for rent have been rented.
today i went to visit a family we helped move 3 years ago, and whom we see every year when we come, and she invited me to stay with them when i come to los chiles. actually they were the family susy lived with when she stayed in los chiles for the 8 months she lived here. i thought she had lived with another family. anyway it will be so much better. i will be able to leave some clothes here and toothbrush and stuff so i don't always have to pack my heavy backpack back and forth all the time. i don't mind walking the 8kms from the highway to amparo except when my pack is really heavy.
today i went to visit a family we helped move 3 years ago, and whom we see every year when we come, and she invited me to stay with them when i come to los chiles. actually they were the family susy lived with when she stayed in los chiles for the 8 months she lived here. i thought she had lived with another family. anyway it will be so much better. i will be able to leave some clothes here and toothbrush and stuff so i don't always have to pack my heavy backpack back and forth all the time. i don't mind walking the 8kms from the highway to amparo except when my pack is really heavy.
world vision
i have met with vision mundial here a few times and i have gone to 9 very poor schools here (there are so many more though). when asked what the greatest need was the teachers have said food, the children are hungry and there is no food. i know you can buy a goat or chickens for villages for world vision. i thought that might work for the villages i have gone to but the doctor at the ministry of health said that the animals would be stolen. everyone is so poor and hungry. how do you make it work when people buy animals for a village for world vision? who do you give the animals to, who takes care of them, who feeds them when there is no food, etc.? in addition the children need shoes, uniforms, clothes, school supplies. the ministry of health is starting a program in these 10 schools to promote good dental care, good health, good nutrition by providing cereal and milk but they need sponsors willing to donate the necessary supplies. most of these villages don't have electricity or potable water.
yesterday i sent email requests to colgate-palmolive for toothbrushes, paste and soap, kelloggs for cereal, dos pinos in costa rica for milk. i don't know that they will even respond to my email never mind actually supply some of the needed items. can you tell me if there are other companies that donate foodstuffs for hungry children, or shoes, or clothes, or school supplies.
the doctor here said children don't have underwear and when i took a little boy shopping for clothes so he could go to school he asked if i would buy him underwear. (i can't imagine what the girls do when they reach puberty here)
i'd really appreciate any help you can give me on how to provide a sustainable food source for the kids in these impoverished villages.
yesterday i sent email requests to colgate-palmolive for toothbrushes, paste and soap, kelloggs for cereal, dos pinos in costa rica for milk. i don't know that they will even respond to my email never mind actually supply some of the needed items. can you tell me if there are other companies that donate foodstuffs for hungry children, or shoes, or clothes, or school supplies.
the doctor here said children don't have underwear and when i took a little boy shopping for clothes so he could go to school he asked if i would buy him underwear. (i can't imagine what the girls do when they reach puberty here)
i'd really appreciate any help you can give me on how to provide a sustainable food source for the kids in these impoverished villages.
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
schools on the frontier
went to 5 of the poorer schools along the frontier today with the ministry of health. at least half, or more, of the children didn't have any shoes, when asked what the children needed the first teacher said food, cuz the children were hungry and they didn't have any money to buy food. 3 of the schools didn't have any power. 1 pumped water from the ground using a plastic pipe, 1 had potable water, the rest have foul water they pull up out of dirty, antique wells. it took us 6 hours to visit 5 schools. they were spread out over the worst roads and it was the most bone jarring ride of my entire life. before we got to the second school i thought there is no way i want to come back here again but by the time i got to the 3rd school i thought there is no way i would have wanted to miss it. i had thought maybe the team wouldn't come here, then i knew that i wanted them to see it. there were houses with palm frond roofs and i saw one women standing in a river washing her clothes.
the ministry of health is just presenting their program to the teachers at 10 schools this week. thursday we will go to the other 5 schools. once they have thought about it they can tell us what the greatest need is.
the min of health program is to provide toothbrushes, toothpaste and soap to each school and to educate the children on cleanliness and brushing their teeth and to provide milk and cereal and teach them about healthy eating. other needs are for school notebooks, pencils, uniforms, shoes, etc.
the ministry of health is just presenting their program to the teachers at 10 schools this week. thursday we will go to the other 5 schools. once they have thought about it they can tell us what the greatest need is.
the min of health program is to provide toothbrushes, toothpaste and soap to each school and to educate the children on cleanliness and brushing their teeth and to provide milk and cereal and teach them about healthy eating. other needs are for school notebooks, pencils, uniforms, shoes, etc.
nicaragua
went to nicaragua today. i may not be able to prove it though cuz i can't get my passport stamped. but it was an adventure, getting down on your hands and knees and crawling under the barbed wire fence so you can get your picture taken and say you've been to nicaragua.
spiritual gifts
my Spiritual Gifts
Evangelism 16
Prophecy 8
Teaching 4
Exhortation 10
Pastor/Shepherd 13
Showing Mercy 21
Serving 20
Giving 12
Administration 9
About Your Spiritual Gifts
Spiritual gifts are tools God gives Christians to do the work of the ministry -- to fulfill the Great Commission to reach, baptize, and teach and to minister to one another. Every Christian receives at least one gift at the moment of salvation. Spiritual gifts are not rewards, are not natural talents, are not a place of service, are not an age-group ministry, and are not a specialty ministry. They express themselves through various ministries which, in turn, accomplish a variety of results. A spiritual gift is the primary channel by which the Holy Spirit ministers through the believer. It is a supernatural capacity for servive to God -- and He gives you a supernatural desire to perform the duties of that gift. Spiritual gifts are tools for building the church. They are a source of joy in your Christian life and influence your motives. A spiritual gift is a divine calling with a divine responsibility, because what God has gifted you to do, He has called you to do, and what He has called you to do, He has gifted you to do.
Your dominant gifts are Showing Mercy, Serving
The results of your Spiritual Gifts Inventory indicate that your number one dominant gift is MERCY SHOWING! The Greek word "ellco" means to feel sympathy with or for others. As a mercy-shower you have the Spirit-given capacity and desire to serve God by identifying with and comforting those who are in distress. You understand and comfort your fellow Christian. You enter into the grief or happiness of others and have the ability to show empathy which is to feel WITH others, not just for others.
As a mercy-shower you are willing to deal with and minister to people who have needs that most people feel very uncomfortable working with. You seem to say the right thing at the right time. Your personality is likely one of soft-spoken love. It hurts you to scold someone; you are very non-condemning. People love you because of all the love you give them. You find it easy to express yourself and are outgoing with a low-key, inoffensive personality. You are easy to talk to, responsive to people, a good listener, peaceable, and agreeable. You tend to make decisions based on feelings more than fact and like to think about things for a while before making a decision.
In your burden to comfort others, your heart goes out to the poor, the aged, the ill, the underprivileged, and so on. You tend to attract people who are hurting or rejoicing because you identify with them. Be careful not to let others use you. Try not to resent others who are not as understanding as you. Refrain from becoming a gossiper when you are around other mercy-showers. Do not let your circumstances control you. Because of your supernatural ability to show mercy, others accuse you of taking up for people, being a softy and a compromiser. They may think you are too emotional.
Mercy-showers make excellent counselors. However, left untrained, you may destroy yourself by your tendency to take people's problems home with you. Your empathy can become detrimental without personal training on how to deal with it.
Beware of Satan's attack on your gift. He can cause pride because of your ability to relate to others. He may influence you to disregard rules and authority. You may experience a lack of discipline because of strong feeling for those who hurt due to disobedience and sin. Don't fall into Satan's trap of complaining and griping.
HOW CAN YOU USE YOUR GIFT? Your gift is used best in times of sorrow and in times of great joy. It fits well with another gift of service such as deacon, youth worker or hospital visitation. With a counseling course, you could become a good counselor. You may serve as a hospital, nursing home, or shut-in worker; a funeral coordinator and provider of sympathy and support; or a poverty center worker. You would do well as an usher or greeter and welcome center worker or hospitality person. You may want to work in a telephone ministry. You would make people feel welcome on a newcomer visitation team. Other appropriate ministry areas include missions, committee member, furlough assistance, and correspondence helper. You would work well with the elderly and with people who have mental and physical disabilities, in nursing, and with special ministries to migrants, released offenders or abused children and women.
The results of your Spiritual Gifts Inventory indicate that your second dominant gift is SERVING! The Greek word "Diakonia" means to do service. In Acts 6:1 the word is interpreted "ministration." Our word deacon comes from the same Greek word. Actually the gift of serving combines helps and ministering. The word "helps" is used in 1 Corinthians 12:28 and "ministering" in Romans 12:7. As a server you have the Spirit-given capacity and desire to serve God by rendering practical help in both physical and spiritual matters. You enjoy meeting the practical needs of your fellow Christians and the church.
The gift of serving is not the gift God gives you when you cannot do anything else. It is spiritual in nature and as important as any gift in the church. Never think it is anything less; it only becomes less if you do not use it as God intended.
As a server you are the person who is willing to do a million and one necessary tasks in the church. You probably do not realize that your love for the Lord is showing every time the doors of the church are open, especially if you oiled the hinges last week so they don't squeak any more. You are happy working behind the scenes. You are ambitious, often involved in a variety of activities, and enjoy manual projects. You are loyal, sincere, tolerant, faithful, and devoted. Most people find you easy going, likable, congenial, and inoffensive. You can listen to others without being critical. You do not like to be in the spotlight and prefer not to express yourself publicly.
You are quick to respond to needs and impressed with the need to respond when exhorted to serve. Because of this, you find it difficult to say no. You like to support a good leader. Some consider you a workaholic. You tend to emphasize practical needs over spiritual needs.
Be careful that you complete what you start and do not neglect the needs of your own family by trying to meet so many needs in the church or in others' homes. Be willing to read and follow directions in the beginning--not just when all else fails. Because of your quick response, some people think you jump in too fast. Others think you neglect spiritual needs.
Beware of Satan's attack on your gift. He can cause pride because of the work you do. He may cause you to feel insignificant or cause you to lack concern for people or for spiritual growth. Impatience and lack of knowledge cause poor-quality workmanship.
HOW CAN YOU USE YOUR GIFT? Your gift may put you into action. You may serve as manager of maintenance and grounds. You can do may tasks such as paint the walls, pick up trash, sort hymnals, clean the baptistry, keep the nursery or launder nursery bedding, cook meals, paint signs, drive the bus, help with the choir, run errands, serve as an audio-video worker, help with recordkeeping, be the church librarian, act as a greeter or an usher, serve as a stage hand in drama productions or as a photographer. You may want to help in special ministries such as migrant or community help (with home repairs or meal-on-wheels for the needy and elderly), as a hospitality worker for newcomers, or as an instrumentalist. You may also enjoy beautifying the church ground with flower gardens and landscaping. The list goes on.
Evangelism 16
Prophecy 8
Teaching 4
Exhortation 10
Pastor/Shepherd 13
Showing Mercy 21
Serving 20
Giving 12
Administration 9
About Your Spiritual Gifts
Spiritual gifts are tools God gives Christians to do the work of the ministry -- to fulfill the Great Commission to reach, baptize, and teach and to minister to one another. Every Christian receives at least one gift at the moment of salvation. Spiritual gifts are not rewards, are not natural talents, are not a place of service, are not an age-group ministry, and are not a specialty ministry. They express themselves through various ministries which, in turn, accomplish a variety of results. A spiritual gift is the primary channel by which the Holy Spirit ministers through the believer. It is a supernatural capacity for servive to God -- and He gives you a supernatural desire to perform the duties of that gift. Spiritual gifts are tools for building the church. They are a source of joy in your Christian life and influence your motives. A spiritual gift is a divine calling with a divine responsibility, because what God has gifted you to do, He has called you to do, and what He has called you to do, He has gifted you to do.
Your dominant gifts are Showing Mercy, Serving
The results of your Spiritual Gifts Inventory indicate that your number one dominant gift is MERCY SHOWING! The Greek word "ellco" means to feel sympathy with or for others. As a mercy-shower you have the Spirit-given capacity and desire to serve God by identifying with and comforting those who are in distress. You understand and comfort your fellow Christian. You enter into the grief or happiness of others and have the ability to show empathy which is to feel WITH others, not just for others.
As a mercy-shower you are willing to deal with and minister to people who have needs that most people feel very uncomfortable working with. You seem to say the right thing at the right time. Your personality is likely one of soft-spoken love. It hurts you to scold someone; you are very non-condemning. People love you because of all the love you give them. You find it easy to express yourself and are outgoing with a low-key, inoffensive personality. You are easy to talk to, responsive to people, a good listener, peaceable, and agreeable. You tend to make decisions based on feelings more than fact and like to think about things for a while before making a decision.
In your burden to comfort others, your heart goes out to the poor, the aged, the ill, the underprivileged, and so on. You tend to attract people who are hurting or rejoicing because you identify with them. Be careful not to let others use you. Try not to resent others who are not as understanding as you. Refrain from becoming a gossiper when you are around other mercy-showers. Do not let your circumstances control you. Because of your supernatural ability to show mercy, others accuse you of taking up for people, being a softy and a compromiser. They may think you are too emotional.
Mercy-showers make excellent counselors. However, left untrained, you may destroy yourself by your tendency to take people's problems home with you. Your empathy can become detrimental without personal training on how to deal with it.
Beware of Satan's attack on your gift. He can cause pride because of your ability to relate to others. He may influence you to disregard rules and authority. You may experience a lack of discipline because of strong feeling for those who hurt due to disobedience and sin. Don't fall into Satan's trap of complaining and griping.
HOW CAN YOU USE YOUR GIFT? Your gift is used best in times of sorrow and in times of great joy. It fits well with another gift of service such as deacon, youth worker or hospital visitation. With a counseling course, you could become a good counselor. You may serve as a hospital, nursing home, or shut-in worker; a funeral coordinator and provider of sympathy and support; or a poverty center worker. You would do well as an usher or greeter and welcome center worker or hospitality person. You may want to work in a telephone ministry. You would make people feel welcome on a newcomer visitation team. Other appropriate ministry areas include missions, committee member, furlough assistance, and correspondence helper. You would work well with the elderly and with people who have mental and physical disabilities, in nursing, and with special ministries to migrants, released offenders or abused children and women.
The results of your Spiritual Gifts Inventory indicate that your second dominant gift is SERVING! The Greek word "Diakonia" means to do service. In Acts 6:1 the word is interpreted "ministration." Our word deacon comes from the same Greek word. Actually the gift of serving combines helps and ministering. The word "helps" is used in 1 Corinthians 12:28 and "ministering" in Romans 12:7. As a server you have the Spirit-given capacity and desire to serve God by rendering practical help in both physical and spiritual matters. You enjoy meeting the practical needs of your fellow Christians and the church.
The gift of serving is not the gift God gives you when you cannot do anything else. It is spiritual in nature and as important as any gift in the church. Never think it is anything less; it only becomes less if you do not use it as God intended.
As a server you are the person who is willing to do a million and one necessary tasks in the church. You probably do not realize that your love for the Lord is showing every time the doors of the church are open, especially if you oiled the hinges last week so they don't squeak any more. You are happy working behind the scenes. You are ambitious, often involved in a variety of activities, and enjoy manual projects. You are loyal, sincere, tolerant, faithful, and devoted. Most people find you easy going, likable, congenial, and inoffensive. You can listen to others without being critical. You do not like to be in the spotlight and prefer not to express yourself publicly.
You are quick to respond to needs and impressed with the need to respond when exhorted to serve. Because of this, you find it difficult to say no. You like to support a good leader. Some consider you a workaholic. You tend to emphasize practical needs over spiritual needs.
Be careful that you complete what you start and do not neglect the needs of your own family by trying to meet so many needs in the church or in others' homes. Be willing to read and follow directions in the beginning--not just when all else fails. Because of your quick response, some people think you jump in too fast. Others think you neglect spiritual needs.
Beware of Satan's attack on your gift. He can cause pride because of the work you do. He may cause you to feel insignificant or cause you to lack concern for people or for spiritual growth. Impatience and lack of knowledge cause poor-quality workmanship.
HOW CAN YOU USE YOUR GIFT? Your gift may put you into action. You may serve as manager of maintenance and grounds. You can do may tasks such as paint the walls, pick up trash, sort hymnals, clean the baptistry, keep the nursery or launder nursery bedding, cook meals, paint signs, drive the bus, help with the choir, run errands, serve as an audio-video worker, help with recordkeeping, be the church librarian, act as a greeter or an usher, serve as a stage hand in drama productions or as a photographer. You may want to help in special ministries such as migrant or community help (with home repairs or meal-on-wheels for the needy and elderly), as a hospitality worker for newcomers, or as an instrumentalist. You may also enjoy beautifying the church ground with flower gardens and landscaping. The list goes on.
Friday, February 11, 2005
world vision
last year i volunteered with world vision in costa rica and they took us around to different villages where they have various projects, completed and ongoing. it was an eye opener. they explained how they use the money that people donate.
i have gone to a couple of meetings here. today the speaker actually spoke slow enough that i understood quite a lot of what he said. one lady i had met at another meeting saw me on the street to ask if i was going to the meeting. and the speaker made sure i knew of the next meeting date. the director of world vision in costa rica told me he couldn't really use me cuz my spanish is so bad so i don't know what i'm doing at the meetings but i'm going.
tuesday i went to a farm to see how they are cross breeding different strains of corn and beans to produce a more nutritious and higher yield crop.
13 of us rode 4 hours each way in a 9 passenger van. i got to see a bit more of costa rica and had a free lunch and it didn't rain so all in all it was a good day.
i have gone to a couple of meetings here. today the speaker actually spoke slow enough that i understood quite a lot of what he said. one lady i had met at another meeting saw me on the street to ask if i was going to the meeting. and the speaker made sure i knew of the next meeting date. the director of world vision in costa rica told me he couldn't really use me cuz my spanish is so bad so i don't know what i'm doing at the meetings but i'm going.
tuesday i went to a farm to see how they are cross breeding different strains of corn and beans to produce a more nutritious and higher yield crop.
13 of us rode 4 hours each way in a 9 passenger van. i got to see a bit more of costa rica and had a free lunch and it didn't rain so all in all it was a good day.
1 cor 9:14
'in the same way the LORD has commanded that those who preach the gospel should receive their living from the gospel'
moises - update
he started school and is very happy to be there. thank you for your generosity and making this happen.
Wednesday, February 09, 2005
guilt
guilt - it's what i feel when i've done something wrong. it's something that creates a chasm between me and God. it's what Jesus' sacrifice did to bridge that chasm. and it's something that God delivers me from when i confess my transgression. it's a burden He lifts when He forgives me and restores me to Himself.
another word for generous giving - JOY
we teach on everything else in the bible. if we are to ensure our pastors are paid we need to teach on tithing and giving.
the bible talks more about generous giving than any other subject. it is one of the joys and blessings we have in our relationship with God. if we are not tithing we are missing out on God's blessings.
it is one thing i have read a lot about while i have been here. and everywhere it says that God will bless a generous giver.
if we have so many people in our church and the offering is down so much that the pastors aren't paid and the bills aren't paid i'm guessing that people don't understand the concept of giving. if they don't have a bible and don't understand that concept we are negligent in teaching them and we are depriving them of the joy of generous giving.
as teachers and leaders we need to share this knowledge with them. as we teach the younger generations about the God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, the bible, we teach them about the 10 commandments, Adam and Eve, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, Moses, Noah, David, etc. etc. we teach them about loving God, faithfulness to God, trusting God, serving God, but do we teach them about giving to God.
if they don't learn it when they are young they won't know it when they are old. if they come to Jesus when they are old when will they learn it if we don't teach them. we need to teach everyone, in church, in sunday school, in youth groups, in bible study groups.
it may feel like a touchy subject but if we teach everything else in the bible we also need to teach about generous giving and the joy that comes with it.
the bible talks more about generous giving than any other subject. it is one of the joys and blessings we have in our relationship with God. if we are not tithing we are missing out on God's blessings.
it is one thing i have read a lot about while i have been here. and everywhere it says that God will bless a generous giver.
if we have so many people in our church and the offering is down so much that the pastors aren't paid and the bills aren't paid i'm guessing that people don't understand the concept of giving. if they don't have a bible and don't understand that concept we are negligent in teaching them and we are depriving them of the joy of generous giving.
as teachers and leaders we need to share this knowledge with them. as we teach the younger generations about the God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, the bible, we teach them about the 10 commandments, Adam and Eve, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, Moses, Noah, David, etc. etc. we teach them about loving God, faithfulness to God, trusting God, serving God, but do we teach them about giving to God.
if they don't learn it when they are young they won't know it when they are old. if they come to Jesus when they are old when will they learn it if we don't teach them. we need to teach everyone, in church, in sunday school, in youth groups, in bible study groups.
it may feel like a touchy subject but if we teach everything else in the bible we also need to teach about generous giving and the joy that comes with it.
moises
is a little boy that the team met here a couple of years ago. he had never been to school because the father was gone and the mother worked and he had to stay home to look after 3 younger siblings. moises is 12, his brothers are 3 and 6 and his sister is 1 1/2. i had been looking for him because there was a family in church that wanted to sponsor him. i finally found him and when i asked if he wanted to go to school he said yes but he didn't have the necessary school uniform, supplies and shoes that he needed. i don't know when they last had a shower or clean clothes or if they have ever had a toothbrush.
FOR MOISES - 20,200 colones ($56 canadian) prices might vary slightly depending on the current exchange rate.
shoes - 6500 col
2 underpants - 900 - when you can't buy food you don't worry about underpants.
2 pair sox - 900 - if you've never owned a pair of shoes you've never needed sox before.
white t-shirt - 1000
uniform shirt and pants - 5300
6 notebooks - 2700
backpack, pencils, sharpener, scissors, glue - 2900
FOR THE FAMILY - 7,376 colones ($20)
toothbrushes
toothpaste
soap
apples
cereal
milk
nail clippers
CLOTHES FOR THE FAMILY - 4,800 colones ($13)
i got 3 outfits for the little girl and 2 t-shirts each for each of the boys and 1 tee for the mom. 4,800 colones - that's about $13.00. the store didn't have any pants but they could sure use them. they were all pretty dirty today.
so for everything it was 32,376 colones, about $90.
if you feel you want to contribute please feel free to pay as much as or little as you like. i would like your picture though as i want the children to see who it is that is filled with God's love and generosity. it's like world vision asks people to send their pictures so the sponsored children can see who they are. it's a good thing i think to show the children the faces of the people that care about them.
thank you so much, and
God bless you
teri
FOR MOISES - 20,200 colones ($56 canadian) prices might vary slightly depending on the current exchange rate.
shoes - 6500 col
2 underpants - 900 - when you can't buy food you don't worry about underpants.
2 pair sox - 900 - if you've never owned a pair of shoes you've never needed sox before.
white t-shirt - 1000
uniform shirt and pants - 5300
6 notebooks - 2700
backpack, pencils, sharpener, scissors, glue - 2900
FOR THE FAMILY - 7,376 colones ($20)
toothbrushes
toothpaste
soap
apples
cereal
milk
nail clippers
CLOTHES FOR THE FAMILY - 4,800 colones ($13)
i got 3 outfits for the little girl and 2 t-shirts each for each of the boys and 1 tee for the mom. 4,800 colones - that's about $13.00. the store didn't have any pants but they could sure use them. they were all pretty dirty today.
so for everything it was 32,376 colones, about $90.
if you feel you want to contribute please feel free to pay as much as or little as you like. i would like your picture though as i want the children to see who it is that is filled with God's love and generosity. it's like world vision asks people to send their pictures so the sponsored children can see who they are. it's a good thing i think to show the children the faces of the people that care about them.
thank you so much, and
God bless you
teri
frustration
maybe it was like a had a job when the boys were in school and the parents were at work. i did laundry, cooked meals, cleaned house - with everyone home for the past two months getting up at different times, cooking separate meals for themselves using different pots and pans, not cleaning up after themselves, the mess is constant. now i could spend every moment cleaning and it's frustrating.
maybe it's that i need to feel useful and i don't and i don't know what to do about it.
maybe it's that i need to feel useful and i don't and i don't know what to do about it.
Monday, February 07, 2005
church finances
$6,500 needed to make month end bills and cover january 31st paychecks for staff which have not been paid. next payday is february 15 but they still haven't been paid for january 31 yet. they can't pay their mortgage or rent payments unless we pay them.
i don't know how you feel about it but i doubt that i'd keep working for someone that didn't pay me. don't pay them and hopefully they'll leave?
how do you feed your children? you work, and the people you work for pay you so you can provide shelter for your family and put food on the table. as employers they are required by law to provide an suitable environment in which to work. have you ever been to the office? you freeze your butt off in the winter time because there is no heat in the office.
who do you think our pastors work for? besides God? you and me. that makes us their employers. so who do you think pays their salaries? we do, but according to the finance team we haven't been. as employers who do you think is supposed to pay for their office, their place of employment? their place of employment also is where they conduct services, where you and i go to worship God. people that provide that accommodation expect to get paid. just as you or i would expect to get paid.
the pastors need to get paid.
the rent has to be paid.
suppliers have to be paid. (of goods or services, ie paper, lights)
absolutely everything you have God gave you. you have and are nothing without Him. you breathe because He lets you. you have a job because He provided it.
do you not think He would want you to pay for His disciples that take care of your spiritual needs week after week. what about your physical needs, your emotional needs? when someone in the church is in need who do you think they call first? they call someone they think can do something about it. they call the pastors. do you not think they deserve to be compensated for their devotion, their work.
i do. and the next time you are in need you will think so too. but how long can they survive without getting paid.
how long could you?
i don't know how you feel about it but i doubt that i'd keep working for someone that didn't pay me. don't pay them and hopefully they'll leave?
how do you feed your children? you work, and the people you work for pay you so you can provide shelter for your family and put food on the table. as employers they are required by law to provide an suitable environment in which to work. have you ever been to the office? you freeze your butt off in the winter time because there is no heat in the office.
who do you think our pastors work for? besides God? you and me. that makes us their employers. so who do you think pays their salaries? we do, but according to the finance team we haven't been. as employers who do you think is supposed to pay for their office, their place of employment? their place of employment also is where they conduct services, where you and i go to worship God. people that provide that accommodation expect to get paid. just as you or i would expect to get paid.
the pastors need to get paid.
the rent has to be paid.
suppliers have to be paid. (of goods or services, ie paper, lights)
absolutely everything you have God gave you. you have and are nothing without Him. you breathe because He lets you. you have a job because He provided it.
do you not think He would want you to pay for His disciples that take care of your spiritual needs week after week. what about your physical needs, your emotional needs? when someone in the church is in need who do you think they call first? they call someone they think can do something about it. they call the pastors. do you not think they deserve to be compensated for their devotion, their work.
i do. and the next time you are in need you will think so too. but how long can they survive without getting paid.
how long could you?
Thursday, February 03, 2005
joseph
his brothers wanted to get rid of him because they didn't like what he had to say. and although he spoke the truth his accusers didn't believe him. as he was finally vindicated his brothers feared retribution but he told them that what they had done for evil God had caused for good. remember that with all your evil intentions that God causes all things to work for good for those that love Him. romans 8.28.
judgement day
is coming and he who has told the truth will be vindicated and those who have judged others will themselves be judged.
the enemy
is at work everywhere. he's full of lies and deceit. he wants the saints to fall. he wants to cause division, especially in the church. the church is God's house and the enemy wants it to fall. this war that we fight is a daily struggle against the powers of darkness. we need to love and support and encourage people in our church, we need to lift each other up in prayer, especially our leaders.
if the enemy is using you to cause division in God's house, please go to Him on your knees and ask for forgiveness. every time we condemn each other, we let the enemy win. you don't belong to satan so don't do his dirty work.
if the enemy is using you to cause division in God's house, please go to Him on your knees and ask for forgiveness. every time we condemn each other, we let the enemy win. you don't belong to satan so don't do his dirty work.
church
in my search for a church i checked out several. they were pretty much the same. it was the same truth from the same bible i read but i didn't like how they presented it. for me they were all kinda the same, dry, dull and boring. i'm not condemning them, i'm just saying they weren't for me. and i think everyone should worship at a church where the message stirs their heart and soul. if you don't like your church, if it isn't filling your needs don't go to it. find another church, one that will meet your needs. but don't try and change the leadership to suit your own selfish agenda if it is obviously filling the needs of the multitude. i'm so thankful i attend a church where the pastor speaks words that touches mine and others hearts do deeply as to produce tears.
Jesus
He spoke the truth but they crucified Him for it. He hung out with sinners but He didn't sin. He was betrayed by friends, people He loved and trusted. He told the truth but they didn't believe Him. they said He lied but He didn't. After He was gone some of those that had crucified Him finally believed the Truth. who are you trying to crucify? they tried to convince others of their lies but He didn't waver from the truth. they didn't believe that He was only doing the work of the Father. His true friends knew He spoke the truth. they believed Him and in Him and they were blessed by His friendship. they hunted him down as a crowd because they were cowards. they wanted to get rid of Him because they didn't believe He spoke the truth. who are you trying to get rid of? are you like them? self-righteous and holier than thou?
?
i love the family in amparo but was getting frustrated there. it's a different culture and the women do everything and are expected to do everything. i enjoyed doing everything but did not like that it was always 'expected'. the dad would come in and say 'teri - coffee' like in other words drop what you're doing and serve me. the pastor would show up and they would say ' teri - coffee for the pastor' it was funny - one time i had just returned from a 7 km walk with the boys and was tired and they said that. i blurted out almost automatically, in english of course, ''he knows where it is''. they literally revere the pastors here. i don't - they are the same as anyone else. the youngest boys laughed although they could not have understood what i said. another time i was making dinner and the dad came in and said 'teri coffee' and i said i'm busy and translated it so he understood.
so the reason i needed to get away was because of my sin of condemning them, pointing fingers at them i had 4 more pointing back at me. God was convicting me but i wasn't listening. it was only when i had some time alone with Him here and was on my knees that i heard what He was saying.
now i'm ready to go back home (amparo) but things seem to be happening here in los chiles. i haven't connected with the pastor here yet so am staying til sunday so i can see him on saturday. then on sunday am i will go home cuz i want to go to the boys soccer game. but i have to come back on monday cuz i'm going somewhere at 6am tuesday am with vision mundial and el ministerio de salud. (world vision and ministry of health)
we really don't know how fortunate we are. on the frontier i don't expect to find people living underground but they live in squalor nonetheless. i should've added that to things i'm grateful for cuz boy i sure am.
so the reason i needed to get away was because of my sin of condemning them, pointing fingers at them i had 4 more pointing back at me. God was convicting me but i wasn't listening. it was only when i had some time alone with Him here and was on my knees that i heard what He was saying.
now i'm ready to go back home (amparo) but things seem to be happening here in los chiles. i haven't connected with the pastor here yet so am staying til sunday so i can see him on saturday. then on sunday am i will go home cuz i want to go to the boys soccer game. but i have to come back on monday cuz i'm going somewhere at 6am tuesday am with vision mundial and el ministerio de salud. (world vision and ministry of health)
we really don't know how fortunate we are. on the frontier i don't expect to find people living underground but they live in squalor nonetheless. i should've added that to things i'm grateful for cuz boy i sure am.
Wednesday, February 02, 2005
things i am grateful for...
that i am not freezing my buns off right now
i don't have to cut the grass with a machete
i don't have to chop down a tree with an axe
i don't have to walk 11 kms to school and back each day
i don't have to limb a tree with a machete
that i have had this opportunity to come to cr and have some awesome times with God
my salvation
forgiveness no matter how many times i screw up
a strong back to carry my back pack
2 good eyes to see the beauty of God's creation
to have met some wonderful people here
to have a wonderful family that love me
2 strong legs to carry me wherever i go
that the Holy Spirit convicts me when i sin so that i might get straight with God
a breeze on a hot sunny day
a ride when my pack is heavy and i'm tired
circumstances that have shaped my life
people i have known
the kindness of strangers
the ability to hear beautiful music and laughter of little children
the ability to sing joyful music
answered prayers
unanswered prayers
freedom to worship where and when i want
having enough food to eat
having clean water to drink
calculators
God's love
joy
peace
friends
we have so many things to be grateful for
i don't have to cut the grass with a machete
i don't have to chop down a tree with an axe
i don't have to walk 11 kms to school and back each day
i don't have to limb a tree with a machete
that i have had this opportunity to come to cr and have some awesome times with God
my salvation
forgiveness no matter how many times i screw up
a strong back to carry my back pack
2 good eyes to see the beauty of God's creation
to have met some wonderful people here
to have a wonderful family that love me
2 strong legs to carry me wherever i go
that the Holy Spirit convicts me when i sin so that i might get straight with God
a breeze on a hot sunny day
a ride when my pack is heavy and i'm tired
circumstances that have shaped my life
people i have known
the kindness of strangers
the ability to hear beautiful music and laughter of little children
the ability to sing joyful music
answered prayers
unanswered prayers
freedom to worship where and when i want
having enough food to eat
having clean water to drink
calculators
God's love
joy
peace
friends
we have so many things to be grateful for
PLEASE...
if one of your spiritual gifts is giving or if you have a heart for feeding the hungry or clothing the poor, PLEASE contact me.
just had a meeting with dr. molina and the ministry of health in los chiles. they said they will take me to the schools on the frontier where the only food the kids have is bananas. they cannot accept money directly but would shop with me to purchase the things the kids need. this way i can see where the money is going, ie for toothpaste, toothbrushes, soap, pencils and notebooks for school, etc.
i told dr. molina about the program world vision had for the schools in guanacaste, another province of costa rica, ie having gardens right at the schools and the kids learning to grow food there. if their sole food source is bananas i would think they would be pretty motivated.
i used to have a pretty green thumb but seeing what they had to start with to make the garden was pretty disheartening. they had to cut down the jungle with machetes to even just clear a space for a garden.
they need money to accomplish this. i know there are people out there that have money and have the gift of giving and maybe a heart for missions, or maybe just a heart for poor, hungry people, but can't go themselves and would want to support them - i just need to find them. any idea where i can start. if you are one of them PLEASE contact me. if you know anyone please have them contact me.
plain white t-shirts for the kids are 1,000 colones - $2.77 cdn. not much but if there are 50 kids it's 50,000 - $138.50 cdn. that's not much for you or i but that's a huge amount when you have nothing.
i heard once that costa rica was a second world country but i have seen third world living conditions first hand here.
as with everything else you may think you're only one person - what difference can you make. it's starts with one and yes you can make a difference.
how much is a tattoo? $70.00? that will buy 5 pairs of school shoes for kids that have never had a pair of shoes in their life.
if you already support kids through world vision for one equal payment of $35.00 you can completely outfit a child here in costa rica for school, shoes, sox, pants, shirt, books.
dr. molina's program is for 10 schools on the frontier but there are so many more schools, every few kilometers here because there is no transportation.
shovels are less than $10 each and if each school had a shovel and seeds, etc. maybe they could start a garden and grow nutritious foods. but they need your help. they don't have the money or the tools.
if a goat could be bought for each school the kids would at least have milk. PLEASE can you not find it in your heart to give.
do you really need that 100th cd?
or another sega game?
can you skip seeing lord of the rings for the 7th time?
can you live without buying another pair of shoes?
do you really need a tv or dvd in every room?
i'm not trying to guilt you out. i know a lot of people have worked very hard to have what they have. and i know a lot of people that live to excess.
i'm asking you to search your heart.
and i'm asking you to give.
PLEASE.
just had a meeting with dr. molina and the ministry of health in los chiles. they said they will take me to the schools on the frontier where the only food the kids have is bananas. they cannot accept money directly but would shop with me to purchase the things the kids need. this way i can see where the money is going, ie for toothpaste, toothbrushes, soap, pencils and notebooks for school, etc.
i told dr. molina about the program world vision had for the schools in guanacaste, another province of costa rica, ie having gardens right at the schools and the kids learning to grow food there. if their sole food source is bananas i would think they would be pretty motivated.
i used to have a pretty green thumb but seeing what they had to start with to make the garden was pretty disheartening. they had to cut down the jungle with machetes to even just clear a space for a garden.
they need money to accomplish this. i know there are people out there that have money and have the gift of giving and maybe a heart for missions, or maybe just a heart for poor, hungry people, but can't go themselves and would want to support them - i just need to find them. any idea where i can start. if you are one of them PLEASE contact me. if you know anyone please have them contact me.
plain white t-shirts for the kids are 1,000 colones - $2.77 cdn. not much but if there are 50 kids it's 50,000 - $138.50 cdn. that's not much for you or i but that's a huge amount when you have nothing.
i heard once that costa rica was a second world country but i have seen third world living conditions first hand here.
as with everything else you may think you're only one person - what difference can you make. it's starts with one and yes you can make a difference.
how much is a tattoo? $70.00? that will buy 5 pairs of school shoes for kids that have never had a pair of shoes in their life.
if you already support kids through world vision for one equal payment of $35.00 you can completely outfit a child here in costa rica for school, shoes, sox, pants, shirt, books.
dr. molina's program is for 10 schools on the frontier but there are so many more schools, every few kilometers here because there is no transportation.
shovels are less than $10 each and if each school had a shovel and seeds, etc. maybe they could start a garden and grow nutritious foods. but they need your help. they don't have the money or the tools.
if a goat could be bought for each school the kids would at least have milk. PLEASE can you not find it in your heart to give.
do you really need that 100th cd?
or another sega game?
can you skip seeing lord of the rings for the 7th time?
can you live without buying another pair of shoes?
do you really need a tv or dvd in every room?
i'm not trying to guilt you out. i know a lot of people have worked very hard to have what they have. and i know a lot of people that live to excess.
i'm asking you to search your heart.
and i'm asking you to give.
PLEASE.
Tuesday, February 01, 2005
going home
maybe it's not time just yet. who knows. i had thought maybe it was but if there is an opportunity to help in these frontera pueblos i want to. i have learned my lesson about saying i will do this or that for however long but i can't help recalling that God so clearly said 'but only for one year' 2 days after i got here. so maybe He can still use me here.
don't know. but it feels so good to feel useful again.
don't know. but it feels so good to feel useful again.
treasures
i was so looking forward to coming home and having a hot bath, with bubbles, just laying in it til the water got cold. i'm so used to washing dishes the costa rican way in cold water i'm going to bring their dish soap home with me.
i think of the big house i had, all the clothes i had, all the things i had. they are worth nothing as i am reminded of the people living underground in cr. i wonder what kind of living conditions i will encounter on the frontera. people that don't have water period, never mind hot water.
like the bible says about treasures. i had a house, robbers broke in and stole things.
last week i bought a bag of platano chips for some little girl on the bus. omg what a humungous smile. now that's a treasure.
i think of the big house i had, all the clothes i had, all the things i had. they are worth nothing as i am reminded of the people living underground in cr. i wonder what kind of living conditions i will encounter on the frontera. people that don't have water period, never mind hot water.
like the bible says about treasures. i had a house, robbers broke in and stole things.
last week i bought a bag of platano chips for some little girl on the bus. omg what a humungous smile. now that's a treasure.
extreme poverty
this am i went to the ministerio de salud which is next door to the hotel. not sure if i told you but when i was at the vision mundial meeting for the women last week i met the lady that works for the m de s and she called her boss to talk to me cuz he speaks fluent ingles. anyway he told me about a program he wants to start in the schools to teach the kids about good health and nutrition. i went to enquire about the program for amparo and when i talked with this lady today she said it was meant for the schools along the frontera. she has invited me to come along with her. oh yeah!!! she has to ask her boss but she has a car and wants to take me with her.
they want to provide toothbrushes, toothpaste, cornflakes, milk. it hardly makes a dent but you have to start somewhere. josefa and her daughter have maybe 3 teeth each.
these people in the frontera villages don't have water, electricity, food, clothes, shoes, nada.
i don't know what they live in but last night on the news they showed people that live underground, with the rats, all their garbage, spiders, snakes, disease. it blew me away. to see what conditions people are forced to live in because they have nothing else.
i was shocked at the conditions josefa lives in with her family. last night's news program stunned me. i had thought i couldn't live in a place like josefa's. i know i couldn't live underground. my stomach is churning at the thought.
if you know any companies that would open their wallets. dr. molina is going to approach large corporations here but that all takes time. if you feel it in your heart to donate any amount of money so we can purchase even the very basics for these kids please email me. i haven't seen their living conditions but last nights newscast was sickening.
there are about 10 schools with 30 to 50 kids total.
i feel alive again. i felt useless, like there was nothing here for me to do. thank you Father for answered prayers.
i'm too buzzed right now but is it rom 8.28 - God causes all things to work together for good... all my frustrations led me here. like dany has said - there is victory after the struggle.
they want to provide toothbrushes, toothpaste, cornflakes, milk. it hardly makes a dent but you have to start somewhere. josefa and her daughter have maybe 3 teeth each.
these people in the frontera villages don't have water, electricity, food, clothes, shoes, nada.
i don't know what they live in but last night on the news they showed people that live underground, with the rats, all their garbage, spiders, snakes, disease. it blew me away. to see what conditions people are forced to live in because they have nothing else.
i was shocked at the conditions josefa lives in with her family. last night's news program stunned me. i had thought i couldn't live in a place like josefa's. i know i couldn't live underground. my stomach is churning at the thought.
if you know any companies that would open their wallets. dr. molina is going to approach large corporations here but that all takes time. if you feel it in your heart to donate any amount of money so we can purchase even the very basics for these kids please email me. i haven't seen their living conditions but last nights newscast was sickening.
there are about 10 schools with 30 to 50 kids total.
i feel alive again. i felt useless, like there was nothing here for me to do. thank you Father for answered prayers.
i'm too buzzed right now but is it rom 8.28 - God causes all things to work together for good... all my frustrations led me here. like dany has said - there is victory after the struggle.
pointing fingers
remember when you are pointing fingers at others there are 4 more pointing back at you. something scott said.
as i have been getting frustrated here i have been pointing fingers at others. their lives, their joy has not changed, but mine has. the more i pointed fingers the more distant i became from God. i knew He was there, He is always there, but i had lost my joy. my joy is my intimate relationship with my beloved heavenly Father. without that i am nothing.
i came to los chiles for peace and quiet and to hopefully find my joy. as i have been asking God to convict me so that there would be nothing between us i was complaining about others. the more i complained about others the more miserable i became. i was asking God what happened, why was i miserable, why did i feel like He was distant. He was telling me but i wasn't listening.
i listened last night. and He has restored my joy. and i am alive again.
when you are complaining about others, for whatever reason, you are not justified. it doesn't matter what it is you think they did or didn't do. only God has the right to judge others.
are you complaining about the church, the leaders, anyone else? who gives you the right to complain about anyone? if they have sinned the Holy Spirit will convict them and God will judge them. whether they have sinned or not who are you to throw stones. instead of condemning someone, anyone, love them, support them, encourage them.
Jesus came to do the work of His Father. people were either for Him or against Him. those that were against Him were against God Who sent Him. our pastors are doing the work of our Father and as such they will judged more so than you or i.
lost your joy? what is the Holy Spirit convicting you of that you aren't listening to? didn't murder anyone? or did you? with a harsh angry word?
never had joy? it's the result of having an awesome intimate relationship with your Creator. there is absolutely nothing like it in this world.
thank you Father for not giving up on me and convicting me until i listened. and thank you for restoring my joy.
as i have been getting frustrated here i have been pointing fingers at others. their lives, their joy has not changed, but mine has. the more i pointed fingers the more distant i became from God. i knew He was there, He is always there, but i had lost my joy. my joy is my intimate relationship with my beloved heavenly Father. without that i am nothing.
i came to los chiles for peace and quiet and to hopefully find my joy. as i have been asking God to convict me so that there would be nothing between us i was complaining about others. the more i complained about others the more miserable i became. i was asking God what happened, why was i miserable, why did i feel like He was distant. He was telling me but i wasn't listening.
i listened last night. and He has restored my joy. and i am alive again.
when you are complaining about others, for whatever reason, you are not justified. it doesn't matter what it is you think they did or didn't do. only God has the right to judge others.
are you complaining about the church, the leaders, anyone else? who gives you the right to complain about anyone? if they have sinned the Holy Spirit will convict them and God will judge them. whether they have sinned or not who are you to throw stones. instead of condemning someone, anyone, love them, support them, encourage them.
Jesus came to do the work of His Father. people were either for Him or against Him. those that were against Him were against God Who sent Him. our pastors are doing the work of our Father and as such they will judged more so than you or i.
lost your joy? what is the Holy Spirit convicting you of that you aren't listening to? didn't murder anyone? or did you? with a harsh angry word?
never had joy? it's the result of having an awesome intimate relationship with your Creator. there is absolutely nothing like it in this world.
thank you Father for not giving up on me and convicting me until i listened. and thank you for restoring my joy.
frustrated
i don't know what i thought i came here to do but whatever it was i don't know that i am needed here anymore. the warmth and beauty of this country has been so good for my soul. walks in the garden (the airstrip) and just down the road (solitary country roads) have been amazing times spent with God. i will miss that.
thought i knew why i was coming here but now i haven't a clue. the second day i was here and thanked God for bringing me here because it really felt like home, He very clearly said ''but only for one year.'' it's only been a few months and now i am having doubts of what to do, where to go. after i leave what is there to come back for.
last night i stayed in los chiles at the motel by the river. it was a clean, quiet room, all to myself and i didn't want to go back to amparo.
i will go wherever and do whatever God calls me to but right now i have no idea what or where that is.
please pray that He would reveal His will to me cuz i haven't a clue right now.
thought i knew why i was coming here but now i haven't a clue. the second day i was here and thanked God for bringing me here because it really felt like home, He very clearly said ''but only for one year.'' it's only been a few months and now i am having doubts of what to do, where to go. after i leave what is there to come back for.
last night i stayed in los chiles at the motel by the river. it was a clean, quiet room, all to myself and i didn't want to go back to amparo.
i will go wherever and do whatever God calls me to but right now i have no idea what or where that is.
please pray that He would reveal His will to me cuz i haven't a clue right now.
Monday, January 31, 2005
sex sells and people sell out
the boys watch a lot of music videos here and one day i caught a glimpse of britney spears on a video. dany changed the channel pretty quick but she appeared to be wearing nothing but lace. she may have had talent but she sold herself out for sex. maybe because she didn't really have talent, i don't know. it used to be young girls that wanted to listen to her music but selling sex to young boys and men brings in more dollars i guess.
tv programming here
everything is so blatantly sexual. maybe it is everywhere and i have just missed it because i didn't watch a lot of tv. there is one local entertainment show they watch. they have scantilly clad women gyrating throughout the audience during the entire show. they have other half naked men and women dirty dancing on stage and in the audience, more skin is shown than is covered, they serve alcohol and at the end they pray. i don't know about you but there's something seriously wrong with that picture.
Thursday, January 27, 2005
chico
one day you think you're 16, the next you find out you're almost 21. chico went to nicaragua to find out who he is, what a surprise to find out you're 5 years older than you thought you were. you're too old to be adopted but he still wants to change his names to be the same as the family here.
he has had dreams of being a pastor and playing the keyboard and singing in church. he has separate bible study with the pastor here but he only has a couple years of schooling and would need a lot more to be a pastor.
the new keyboard cost 104,000 col (about $285), chico gave 65,000 for it and wanted to give more but dany told him no because other people had to give too.
dany told me that chico wants to be a police officer, then he could earn enough money to study to be a pastor.
the starting wage for a cop here is really good money. he would make $415 - A YEAR! if he could get more education he would get an increase to 200,000 colones a year - $554 a year. they work 15 days a month, working 24-7, and have 15 days off.
he has had dreams of being a pastor and playing the keyboard and singing in church. he has separate bible study with the pastor here but he only has a couple years of schooling and would need a lot more to be a pastor.
the new keyboard cost 104,000 col (about $285), chico gave 65,000 for it and wanted to give more but dany told him no because other people had to give too.
dany told me that chico wants to be a police officer, then he could earn enough money to study to be a pastor.
the starting wage for a cop here is really good money. he would make $415 - A YEAR! if he could get more education he would get an increase to 200,000 colones a year - $554 a year. they work 15 days a month, working 24-7, and have 15 days off.
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
i'm guilty
of judging others. i condemn others when i am upset with them. when i said i wrote it for people here i think i wrote it for myself. i have yet to show it to anyone other than the pastor but i am reminded of it frequently.
when we say someone is lazy, inconsiderate, impatient, it may be true but it's not my place and it's not your place to judge them.
are we blind or what that we cannot see the log jam in our own eyes.
are you a christian, are you walking the walk, or are you just talking the talk. judgemental talk, condemning talk, criticizing talk. before you want to throw stones, or gossip, or condemn - look in the mirror. then ask for forgiveness because none of us are without sin.
when we say someone is lazy, inconsiderate, impatient, it may be true but it's not my place and it's not your place to judge them.
are we blind or what that we cannot see the log jam in our own eyes.
are you a christian, are you walking the walk, or are you just talking the talk. judgemental talk, condemning talk, criticizing talk. before you want to throw stones, or gossip, or condemn - look in the mirror. then ask for forgiveness because none of us are without sin.
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
shoes
the school year starts 7 february here. almost all kids walk barefoot. i have seen some kids walking pigeon-toed wearing shoes that don't fit them. they don't complain, they just curl their toes up. for 5,000 colones, costa rican currency, you can buy a pair of school shoes for a boy or girl. depending on the exchange it's about $14 cdn. 8,000 colones if your feet are bigger. if you don't have a uniform you don't go to school. if you don't have money to buy a uniform you may get one that's been passed down til it's worn thin. at christmas when they were interviewing kids on tv and asking them what they wanted for christmas most said shoes and-or pants. most people i know wear second hand clothes but it's tough to wear shoes that have already been worn and molded into the shape of someone else's foot.
instead of buying a 7th pair of shoes how about buying a first pair of shoes for a little boy or girl in costa rica.
instead of buying a 7th pair of shoes how about buying a first pair of shoes for a little boy or girl in costa rica.
tica
the family dog was murdered last week along with 8 others dogs in amparo. the family thinks it was one of the town drunks but i guess it's hard to prove. the dogs were poisoned and or shot or both. the police are investigating but i think pretty well anyone can become a cop here with very little, if any, training. at one point i saw one of them with his gun in his pocket. if he tripped and fell he could shoot himself i'm sure.
anyway there had been one puppy that they had not found a home for so now they will keep him. his name is smeagle.
anyway there had been one puppy that they had not found a home for so now they will keep him. his name is smeagle.
coral snake
got up a couple of days ago to learn that a coral snake had been found inside the house. patricio had found it in the middle of the night on his way to the bathroom and cut it's head off. i am so-o thankful i didn't find it. my biggest fear is spiders but that does not mean that i am not afraid of snakes. dany was kind enough to explain the blood stain on the floor and show me the remains. it was about 1 1-2 feet, about as big around as a finger but as dany explained very dangerous.
there is a hole in the floor to drain the water out of the bathroom when the roof leaks - it has since been stuffed with a mat.
there is a hole in the floor to drain the water out of the bathroom when the roof leaks - it has since been stuffed with a mat.
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
hanging in there
i'm reading that moses persevered, he endured because he saw the culmination of his efforts and God's purposes. it was credited to him as faith.
is that what it is?
is that what it is?
should i stay or should i go
the personal conflicts, the constant noise, loud music, no quiet solitary place to be alone with God. each time i'm ready to pack up and go elsewhere because i need a break from all the noise i talk to God and He changes my mind. why? i want to spend more time reading His Word so why shouldn't i go. is He keeping me here because the more i am frustrated the more i seek His face? or am i growing through it? am i more hungry for the Truth when i am in need compared to just reading it like a book? am i just impatient in seeing Your work in me?
new keyboard
jose has been playing it all day and when he isn't somebody else is. i went to the church to do yard work thinking i'd have peace and quiet - no luck. right now eitel is playing the stereo, meffi is playing the keyboard, dany is teach math, mimi has a friend over and patricio is singing. argh!!!
and a short while later, mimi has her tv going, the boys have theirs and jose is playing the new keyboard.
there is nowhere to hide from all the noise.
and a short while later, mimi has her tv going, the boys have theirs and jose is playing the new keyboard.
there is nowhere to hide from all the noise.
puppies
i hate the way they treat animals here. thankfully there are only 2 left but patricio kicks them. i can always tell when he comes home because the puppies are crying and i hear him yelling at them. when i looked out the window 1 is running away with his tail betwen his legs and dany said patricio had kicked it.
keep reading
i have read the bible a couple of times and i've never got as much from it as i have in the past few months and i rarely have the peace and quiet here to read. but when i have questions, when i have doubts, when i am struggling, i talk to God and He opens my eyes to the wisdom and truths in His Word. when i need answers He shows me where to find them and helps me to see.
He is so amazing!
He is so amazing!
lending
luke 6.34,35 'if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment what credit is that... love your enemies, do good to them and lend to them without expecting to get anything back'
don't know about you but i needed to hear that.
don't know about you but i needed to hear that.
hotmail
came to san carlos to email and hotmail isn't working. i'm not ignoring you but i can't read or send mail.
going to alex's to have lunch with him today. i asked if he'd make his pancakes that i love.
going to alex's to have lunch with him today. i asked if he'd make his pancakes that i love.
Thursday, January 13, 2005
i got mail! it was exciting to get mail from home. the family was almost as excited as i was. it was like a treasure. i had read most of my books so a new one was very cool. it was mailed from mission dec 11, received in los chiles dec 30 and received in amparo jan 11. amparo is 1 to 2 hours away, depending on the number of bus stops and whether you are walking. at least i didn't have to go to san jose for it though.
thank you so much for it.
thank you so much for it.
liars
rev 21.8 THE unbelieving, THE murderers, THE sexually immoral, etc. and ALL liars will be in the fiery lake... sometimes i can't believe how dense i can be. how many times do i have to read something before it registers. as i pondered the significance of ALL liars it finally dawned on me. because Jesus is the Word of God and the Word of God is the Truth anyone that is a liar is not of God because they are speaking the opposite of Jesus.
and yet how often am i guilty. we tell ourselves it's only a little white lie. i once heard in bible study that God doesn't see in colours, a lie is a lie is a lie. do we tell a lie so as not to hurt someone's feelings? is it ok to tell a lie if it's not hurting anyone. is it ok to tell a lie because we don't want to share the truth with someone.
i don't know what your bible says but mine says ALL liars will be in the fiery lake...
and yet how often am i guilty. we tell ourselves it's only a little white lie. i once heard in bible study that God doesn't see in colours, a lie is a lie is a lie. do we tell a lie so as not to hurt someone's feelings? is it ok to tell a lie if it's not hurting anyone. is it ok to tell a lie because we don't want to share the truth with someone.
i don't know what your bible says but mine says ALL liars will be in the fiery lake...
snake
when i got home the other day there was a 3 foot long snake draped over the barbed wire. eitel had seen it in the back yard and killed it with a machete. meffi was showing it to me and it had 3-4'' fangs (that's three quarters not 3 to 4 inches but i can't find the slash). i got the shivers now just thinking about it. even though the boys laugh at my fear of spiders they were very serious in telling me how dangerous the snakes are here.
there was a spider on the wall last week that was as wide as the span of my outstretched hand. needless to say i freaked.
there was a spider on the wall last week that was as wide as the span of my outstretched hand. needless to say i freaked.
judging others - parte dos
i had to run to catch the bus so i didn't have time to finish editing something i had written 5 weeks ago. i had titled it 'loving others'. it was written for people here although it's applicable for everyone. how can we love others if we are racists and is classifying one group of people as bad not racism. i wonder what i am seeing here. is it the different culture or is it the same as racism all over the world.
as much as it's about loving everyone, it's also about judging everyone and as i write i wonder how often i am guilty of doing just that.
if we say we love everyone but we don't the unspoken word is still a lie in our hearts and God knows our hearts.
as much as it's about loving everyone, it's also about judging everyone and as i write i wonder how often i am guilty of doing just that.
if we say we love everyone but we don't the unspoken word is still a lie in our hearts and God knows our hearts.
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
judging others
one sunday in church scott said that if your car is broken don't
take it to some one just because he says he's a christian. (forgive me scott if i have misquoted you - it was a long time ago) some people that profess to be christians do not live lives that bring glory to God.
the greatest commandment a christian has is to love the lord your
God with all you heart, with all your soul, with all your mind and
with all you strength. everything we have is from Him, we owe Him no less.
His second commandment is to love your neighbour as yourself. if you really love God with all your heart this will be how you live your life. we have all sinned and when God gave the 10 commandments to moses ex 20.1-17 He didn't say that it was a worse sin to murder or to steal or commit adultery. a sin is a sin is a sin. and God hates each sin equally. but he does love the sinner. he loves each one of us equally.
i went to a church in san jose in october. the pastor asked if
there was anyone there that hadn't been there before to raise their hand. then he asked where everyone was from. there were
people there from honduras, el salvador, columbia, bolivia, brazil,
nicaragua y chile. people from different nations and races all
together under one roof for one reason, to love and worship and
praise god. and God loved everyone of them equally.
it is not up to us to judge anothers sin. God will judge each one
of us rev 20.12. mat 7.1-5 but for the grace of god i could be a
prostitute dying of aids begging for money, but for the grace of
god jose could be a beggar sitting on the streets of san jose, but
for the grace of God danny could be a hungry alcoholic watching
others eat but unable to buy food himself because he's spent all his money on booze, but for the grace of God pastor jose could be a drug addict laying in the street. you don't know my past or my sins and i don't know yours. it doesn't matter because i am not qualified to judge you and you are not qualified to judge me. what's in your heart and how you live your life is between you and God, but don't be fooled into thinking you are righteous and holy if you are not living your life according to the 2 great commandments Jesus gave us. you may be kidding yourself, fooling others but you are not kidding God.
when Jesus commanded us to love our neighbour he didn't mean just the sweet little old lady that lives next door or the nice family down the street or the hard working man that worships beside you in church, He meant everyone.
God loves everyone and 1 tim 2.3-6 He says He wants ALL men to be saved and we don't know the circumstances of their life that may change and the prostitute, alcoholic, beggar or drug addict may become beloved children of God, passionate disciples serving Him and tellling others about Him. 1 tim 2. 5 and 6 Christ Jesus who gave Himself as a ransom for ALL men.
God wants you to love everyone as you love yourself. He made us all different. how boring life would be if we were all the same but He gave us all the same capacity for loving Him and others. if
everyone obeyed these 2 commandments there would be no wars, no racism. love your neighbour whether they are panamanian,
nicaraguan, honduran or guatemalan. you never know if one day they may be your pastor.
1 john 4.7-12 and 19-21
luke 10.25'37 love the lord your god with all your heart, soul,
etc. here tells of the good samaritan it is significant that the person that Jesus commended was neither the religious leader nor the lay associate, but a hated foreigner. bitter hostility existed between jews and samaritans in Jesus' day but Jesus asserted that love knows no national boundaries.
1 john 2.4-6 the man who says 'i know Him' but does not do what He commands is a liar and the truth is not in him. but if anyone obeys His word God's love is truly complete in Him. this is how we know we are in Him. whoever claims to live in Him must walk as Jesus did.
1 john 4.7-12
take it to some one just because he says he's a christian. (forgive me scott if i have misquoted you - it was a long time ago) some people that profess to be christians do not live lives that bring glory to God.
the greatest commandment a christian has is to love the lord your
God with all you heart, with all your soul, with all your mind and
with all you strength. everything we have is from Him, we owe Him no less.
His second commandment is to love your neighbour as yourself. if you really love God with all your heart this will be how you live your life. we have all sinned and when God gave the 10 commandments to moses ex 20.1-17 He didn't say that it was a worse sin to murder or to steal or commit adultery. a sin is a sin is a sin. and God hates each sin equally. but he does love the sinner. he loves each one of us equally.
i went to a church in san jose in october. the pastor asked if
there was anyone there that hadn't been there before to raise their hand. then he asked where everyone was from. there were
people there from honduras, el salvador, columbia, bolivia, brazil,
nicaragua y chile. people from different nations and races all
together under one roof for one reason, to love and worship and
praise god. and God loved everyone of them equally.
it is not up to us to judge anothers sin. God will judge each one
of us rev 20.12. mat 7.1-5 but for the grace of god i could be a
prostitute dying of aids begging for money, but for the grace of
god jose could be a beggar sitting on the streets of san jose, but
for the grace of God danny could be a hungry alcoholic watching
others eat but unable to buy food himself because he's spent all his money on booze, but for the grace of God pastor jose could be a drug addict laying in the street. you don't know my past or my sins and i don't know yours. it doesn't matter because i am not qualified to judge you and you are not qualified to judge me. what's in your heart and how you live your life is between you and God, but don't be fooled into thinking you are righteous and holy if you are not living your life according to the 2 great commandments Jesus gave us. you may be kidding yourself, fooling others but you are not kidding God.
when Jesus commanded us to love our neighbour he didn't mean just the sweet little old lady that lives next door or the nice family down the street or the hard working man that worships beside you in church, He meant everyone.
God loves everyone and 1 tim 2.3-6 He says He wants ALL men to be saved and we don't know the circumstances of their life that may change and the prostitute, alcoholic, beggar or drug addict may become beloved children of God, passionate disciples serving Him and tellling others about Him. 1 tim 2. 5 and 6 Christ Jesus who gave Himself as a ransom for ALL men.
God wants you to love everyone as you love yourself. He made us all different. how boring life would be if we were all the same but He gave us all the same capacity for loving Him and others. if
everyone obeyed these 2 commandments there would be no wars, no racism. love your neighbour whether they are panamanian,
nicaraguan, honduran or guatemalan. you never know if one day they may be your pastor.
1 john 4.7-12 and 19-21
luke 10.25'37 love the lord your god with all your heart, soul,
etc. here tells of the good samaritan it is significant that the person that Jesus commended was neither the religious leader nor the lay associate, but a hated foreigner. bitter hostility existed between jews and samaritans in Jesus' day but Jesus asserted that love knows no national boundaries.
1 john 2.4-6 the man who says 'i know Him' but does not do what He commands is a liar and the truth is not in him. but if anyone obeys His word God's love is truly complete in Him. this is how we know we are in Him. whoever claims to live in Him must walk as Jesus did.
1 john 4.7-12
prayer request
nelson - a 14 year old boy - for salvation. his mother was murdered, how long ago i don't know. he has such a look of emptiness, lifeless, soulless, emotionless.
bread
we gave out bread at church on sunday. pastor jose and patricio went around to the poorest families in town and invited them to church. only a couple of people came instead of the numbers hoped for so we had bread in church as well as people took some home. yesterday jose and i went around to the families that were invited but didn't come. i have been to homes that are made of bamboo, with no doors and no windows and walls that are made of black plastic. although jose referred to the area as the ghetto these houses at least were made of wood and had doors. the look on the woman's face when i gave her a bag of bread was priceless. tears welled up in her eyes. our message was that we would have bread in church and we wanted them to come to church. she said she would. the other families thanked us for the bread but did not indicate they wanted to come to church. we still had bread left so dany and i went back later and gave the first lady another bag of bread. she had a look on her face like you've already given me bread and could hardly believe that we were giving her a gift of another bag of bread.
although our intent is have people come to church for the bread, that way they get the sermon as well, will our actions say more than our words if we continue to take the bread to them.
although our intent is have people come to church for the bread, that way they get the sermon as well, will our actions say more than our words if we continue to take the bread to them.
floods
we are having abnormal amounts of rain. there is a lot of flooding in limon province, on the caribbean side, people swimming the street, houses showing only rooftops. fields around amparo are flooded but nothing like i finally saw on the news last night about limon and sri lanka. incredible.
Saturday, January 08, 2005
rain
ok it's doing the raining for 40 days and 40 nights in 24 hours again. danny and i are in los chiles and have to walk home - if this rain keeps up like this the road might be flooded again. it's definitely an experience. and i wouldn't miss it for the world.
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